Apparently You Can't DREAM CAST Hiding Out...

Over some awesome BBQ Pork, homemade chili leftovers from Ma and cornbread muffins a la Choni, I found out, you can't really Dream Cast  Hiding Out...  We started...  We switched out Zac Efron with John Cryer based on the movie 17 Again, but that's as far as we got much to our chagrin...  It was not our finest hour and I went from "Oh?!? Are we about to have a Dream Cast moment?!?" to "oh hey there's a bus why don't I just walk infront of it..."  Extreme yes, but that's how I felt at that milisecond... 

So I just thought that it would be worth it to know, there's really not a lot to do about Dream Casting movies with three main characters...  Maybe we'll pick this back up again later...  I was thinking switching Jennifer Lawrence with Annabeth Gish... but again..  pretty much stops there... 

Instead we wound our evening down watching Justified off the ol' DVR and to bed we went!!

Hopefully, more Dream Cast-ing to come...

A Soon-to-be Former Hoardita...

Many who know me well could classify me as a mediochre grade hoarder.  I am well aware of this fact.  But as all hoarders will, I defent my piles of crap.  They are collectables, they are sentimentality incarnate...  "I'm going to use that!" or "I know what I want to do with that, I just can't do that right now..."...  the latter actually DOES happen though...

And what's more fantastic about my hoarding? 

My hubby...

I have all this stuff in our house and I am married to man with a photographic memory.  That being said, when I am racking my brain for a How To Use something I often turn to my voice of reason...which is OUTSIDE of my head...thank GOD...

I was going through a moment recently (still going through it actually) and I wanted to toss the CRAP... and for some reason my sights got set on my crafting stuff...  That day it was crap and it was in my way...it must be expunged! 

But then came hubby...and he said "Cleaning's nice and all, I'm a big believer in it, but you're gonna regret this someday soon..."  I set my sights on something else and left the crafts alone.

When Harley lost her first tooth last summer we all were thinking "Woo hoo!!"  But my Woo Hoo turned into uh-oh when my fourth dimensional thinking kicked into gear in a way I couldn't explain if I tried...  When that happens, it's like "Inception" basically...  So I went from, "Aww my baby lost her first tooth" to "do I give her a quarter? a dollar? a half dollar? where the hell is she going to spend a half dollar and what if she thinks it is cool and wants to keep it and doesn't want to spend it and her piggy bank hole will not support a half dollar and what if she loses it under pillow in her room and her room is a mess and then I have to go in there undetected after she's asleep and play needle in the haystack in her room and it's gonna be dark and the baby will be sleeping and there wont' be any way that I can get in there and rummage under her pillow and her piles of blankets for a little tiny puppy tooth and how the hell did my mom do this for two kids two years apart and slip in and out of our rooms undetected and be so ninja and..."

LIGHT BULB

We had pillows...we had tooth fairy pillows...little tiny heart shaped white lacey pillows with little tiny white lacey pockets to hold said treasure post tooth pick up... the dollar.  I caved and went dollar.  Inflation ya know? 

A pillow was a must...  A MUST... so I said all that to say this...



Side 2...One Ruffle... I know...



Side 1 The Pocket Side



Because I am a hoarder, I was able to go into a pile of my crapting and pull out the goodies needed to perform a miracle in thirty minutes.  I made a tooth fairy pillow that was able to go under the bed THAT night and ta-da!  was replaced with a crispy folded dollar bill ...  Thing 1 was so pleased with her new pillow she started working on her second tooth...which came out soon after... Now she is NOT pleased because her teeth are in a falling out holding pattern it seems.  OH well... 

I am STILL looking for areas to thin.  It's odd owning our own house now.  We aren't moving anywhere any time soon and when we would be not so much packing up things, but putting them away is when we do the really big CLEAN.  There are gems I am finding myself needing to hold onto, for now.  I have a box of oil paints that were my Gma Mary's and they've lost their viscosity and I don't like oil painting...GARBAGE!  It feels good to clean and organize and empty drawers!!  I can't wait til we can NOT feel the need so much anymore... One day... but not today ...

365 days ago....

...I went from this...

To this....

and now there's...



It's funny to me....I chuckle about it on a daily basis...how much of that day is a blur and how much of it is like I was watching it on TV and how much of it I remember like it was yesterday...or five minutes ago...

I am constantly learning and soaking in information in this classroom called "Life 101" and I have learned a lot.  I learned that setting yourself up for disappointment is dumb... It really is.  I mean, try for what you want and all...but when all you hear from some people is how things didn't go their way...maybe you're shooting a little too high honey... Knock it off...  I don't shoot at all, so I'm always pleasantly surprised with the outcomes of certain situations and that's what works for me :)  I am a very organized person, I won't lie...  But when I realized that I wasn't going to have the same experience as I did with Thing 1, did I freak the hell out?  No...did I start yelling at people and freaking on them, preventing them from doing the best job possible? No...  I rolled...  that's what I do...that's why I married my fantastic husband... because he rolls with it too...  Now I can happily say that I had the best experience possible because I went in with no expectations... because really, it's all in His hands anyways, right?  Or the Universe's hands if that's your thing.

I had that baby in just over an hour.  I experienced the water breaking...  I experienced one full hour of back to back contractions that gave absolutely NO breaks in between...  constant pain...  two pushes and BOOM!!  And it's BIZARRE to me that once that baby's out it's done... pain gone.  Next on the agenda...

We had a GREAT nurse staff, my doctor made it just in time to catch her and she was, as always, awesome to have in the room...  I am a big believer in doctors, especially when I'm being told I'm "High Risk"...  But I think I like them anyways... Let me rephrase that.  I like MY doctor.  I love her so much that even if I had a regular pregnancy I probably would have had the girls in the hospital anyways cause my relationship with my OB was so RAD!  And we grew up in the same freaking town! 

So that was what happened exactly 365 days ago to the minute...  She was born at 4:10pm and we've LOVED her every minute of every day ever since :)

The Girls

Dream Casting: CLUE

Here is the Dream Cast of "Clue" in the Judd Apatow Universe:

Professor Plum: Jason Segel

Col. Mustard:   Steve Carrell

Mr. Body:       James Franco

Mrs. Peacock:   Jane Lynch

Ms. Scarlet:    Elizabeth Banks

The Cook:       Jonah Hill

Cop:            Craig Robinson

Wadsworth:      Russell Brand

Yvetter:        Kristen Bell

FBI Agent/
Religious Guy:  Michael McKean

Telegram Girl:  Kat Dennings

The Motorist:   Danny McBride

You are welcome!!

Come On In! The Water's Fine!!!!

As the caretaker of the pool of my life...I am happy to say the pH level is perfectly balanced...

There is a black hole that is created in the universe around a certain time of year every year... something about the timing of birthday after birthday in the summer, school starting, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and the K.O being Christmas and New Year's one whole week away from each other...  Just writing that exhausts me...

PLUS:  We have had the added bonus of a fourth wheel to complete our caravan of crazy so it may mozy down the road of the rest of our lives...  Marysuwho a.k.a The Terrible Teether.  Our kids are 99% awesome.  Harley's 1% is her eating habits.  She eats like a bird... I have a hard time shoving nutrition down her throat without her gagging it up.  Marysu...  teething.  She didn't sleep all night from an early age like her big sis...because she started teething earlier and actually produced teeth insanely early!  Teeth didn't even occur to us but about a million other ailments did... Harley teethed, I guess...  I mean she HAS teeth, so obviously they came in right?  Nobody really took notice.. They just showed up one day.  This one, it affects her eating habits and she gets the horrifically watery diarrhea... and sleeplessness...  very little sleeping...lots of tossing and turning and discomfort.  But now that she went through the big long stretch and has 8 teeth it's a once in a while type of thing and she has one night... not NIGHTS... no plurals...

And now that you've been disgusted by mom life... :)

I move on to the rest... the rest is good.  I am extremely happy to be boring right now.  We've done the exciting thing... I got a new planner at the first of the year realizing, " Holy Crap! It's New Year's Day and I have nothing new to write all of the ... nothing?  Nothing????  Really?!?!  No new stuff?!"  I was appalled... I looked in January of my 2012 planner.  If I hadn't known better I would have sworn I just got bored and scribbled on every single day, but that was not the case.  There were more days with "stuff" on them than not.

How does that happen?  It's a blur, truly, so don't ask me.. I'm the worst source... But Choners, he remembers it like it was yesterday... He does that... reason #153 why I loves him so's muches...

I'm NOT about to sit here and "catch up" with what has gone on since October... I doubt very many read this that don't know me... I'm not about to bore anyone to death.  I already have all those other bodies I buried to worry bout, no sense adding to my conscience... heh...

We are planning the big 1st birthday... the ever saddening truth revealing itself that it is more than likely the LAST 1st birthday.  So we're doing it up the way we want and it's gonna be a badass good ole family time...  I can't wait.  I am dying to see the family.  It's been far too long! 

I went to Target on my lunch, again... cause I needed an excuse to get out of the office and check out the $2.50 rugs they have...and everyone needs a rug covered in shamrocks...just sayin.

So my awesome other half and I have this awesome game of awesomeness...  Dream Casting... Take a movie, usually a cult classic type of film...and recast it with the "If you could get ANYONE now to play those roles who would it be"  I think I am going to start a new series of blogs called "Dream Cast: blahblahblah"  I think after I finish this half-assed attempt to play catch up and make myself feel better, I will start it...

That being said... Yeah there's really nothing else going on with this end.  Now that we are coming up on the one year mark, I am having some self realizations that I had when Harley was a year old.  There are changes that occur when you add children to your life.  I guess it's the amount of things that you realize you don't do or do differently and HOW much that bothers you is the real question.  With us, we realize there are things we do differently, but it's the business of birthing childrens...  We accept it so easily and it's not that we MISS these things... it's just different now...and then there's the REST of our lives to get it back. 

Like painting.  I love painting.  It's not some passion, like, I'm NOT the Laird Hamilton of painting.  I'm not winning pro-ams and I certainly don't get depressed when I can't paint and boo hoo... I am biding my time because I see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I just can't paint right now.  And not that I "CAN'T" either, I could, but I choose not too because I would rather avoid the possible frustration that I could be met with trying the double duty of toddler and paint...I will though.  I painted when Harley was little.  Nap times are MAGICAL! And same as sleeping time.  Kids go to sleep earlier than us because we need some alone time to discuss the day and have our moment.  Even when our moment is met over a load of laundry on a neatly made bed.  Often, that is when Daddy hits the exer-bike and I take a shower.  One day, I won't want to take a shower.  I will want to paint.  But right now, like, right right now... I want to sit on the couch and watch my girls play with their Christmas Little People... 

Those moments last only so long.  One day, I'm going to sit and listen to them bitch about how "she's got her SHIT ON MY BED!!!  YOU'RE A SLOB" and I'm not completely deluded into thinking that they're going to be angels to each other all the time like they are now.  So I want to soak it all in now...  have nice, long, crisp memories to hold onto... That way, I can have a nice doped look on my face when they try to get me on one of their sides and have to snap their fingers to get me to come to...at which time I will say, "Uhm, yeah... it's not my problem, fix it yourselves without pain or blood and we'll talk about it when your dad comes home..."  heh...

If You Are Going To Be An Asshole At 4:30am You Need To Be Really Cute Doing It...

...So says the demon who came in the window and stole my baby Marysu...

Yeah, that's what was going on in our house... That's fine.  She can have a night or two here and there.  And that's really what it's been.  A night or two here and there.  But come on folks, what do you remember?  Do you remember the nights you got sleep or the nights you didn't?

Just ask Choners... He remembers EVERYTHING.  With exception, he remembers more sleepless nights than not.  But I chock it up to, he's a Dad...

Hey, it's what helps ME sleep at night... bah-dum-ch...

I just remember laying in bed, hearing whining...then the whining stopped.  and the long procession of "Ptththhhththhtht..." began...and apparently, more whining...and then Dad got up... the whining stopped... he laid down... it started again...  He surrendered at Appomatox and the Yanks were cheering... or I shall say... blowing raspberries at the defeated.

Then I get a picture of the Winner...alseep in her high chair... So, really... Winner? or Loser?  I think Daddy lost the battle, but won the war...  muahahahahahaha...

It's little things like this that make being a parent awesome...

Really...

Oh and manipulation...  I don't usually like manipulation.. I think it's sneaky...  I like things straight forward.  But Harley is a brain ninja sometimes... so I have to play dirty.

I needed her to get her work done early so we can go see Nina on Friday while she is town!!  YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!  The usual niceties weren't working... wah-wah-waaahhh...  I wanted the visit to be a surprise... but behold.. My child doesn't really give you the opportunity for surprise.  Something always comes along that causes you to blow the surprise right out of the water.  I have come to accept this for the most part.  So, I finally told her,"Ok here's the deal smarty pants.  You need to do two days worth of your homework packet tonight so that we can go see Nina cause she's in town..." 

The packet is done.

The End.

Kids are awesome dammit...  no matter what anybody says...

There I go, NOT speaking English again...

After repeating myself for the hundredth time to the four hundredth customer, I decided I must not be speaking English...
Amazing, I MUST be a genius...  And I didn't even KNOW IT!
Because why else would so many people ask me so many times if they called the right company?
You'd be surprised how many people don't call the right company...
They meant to call SEARS collections or the phone company in their part of rural Alabama (which is nowhere near me, notice the incredibly small percentage of times you see me type "ya'll")...

If I had a toddler attempting to speak in my house I would get it.
My baby doesn't talk... She doesn't even walk.. yet.  And I stress the "yet".

Marysu is 8 months and some odd days... lets say 8 and a half months and call it a day.  Fine? Fine.  Great, grand, wonderful.

And we're about to close the baby factory.  So all these cute little holy-shit-oh-dear-God things she is doing lately, we are freaking out over.  And Harley is freaking out, too.  Which is cool and all, but I thought I was going to find a finger on the ground when Harley came into the bathroom whilst I was occupying it and said,"Mom you gotta come see this!" 

No finger, it was merely the baby... playing with toys that Harley had set out on the coffee table.  But she was standing on her own, not leaning.  Wow.  That WAS a big'un.  Then last night she did it again, and me n daddy were freaking out.  Then she did the cutest thing ever, she danced.  We were watching Dark Shadows.  You know, good wholesome family viewing.
There is a montage and the song made Marysu dance.  She was standing in front of the coffee table, but was looking alongside it, not across from it.  The TV had her attention, but more so the song that was playing.  Her attention was better paid to the mound of Cheerios on the table.  Her left arm was keeping her balance, her body was faced to the side of the table and her right hand was grabbing Cheerios.  Basically, she was merely using the table as a crutch.  And bouncing.  She was bouncing to the music...  I couldn't believe it.  It was the most adorable thing ever.  And not one damned camera in sight!  What the hell is that about? 

There are so many cameras in my house I couldn't believe there wasn't one to capture this!  And when kids realize you think they are doing something awesome and are scrambling for a picture... they stop.  It's the universal law of children vs. photography of any kind.  So, I got ahold of my phone, and boom... no more dancing.  As if someone hit a button and her brain and body stopped.  Dammit.  Oh well.

Tomorrow we have Saturday "off".  No plans, no trips, no nothing.  I was stunned when I got the news from Choni that we would NOT be doing anything spectacular... Uhm... Okay...  Well, it's cooler.. so what better way to spend a cool day in a small house than to bake cookies!  I went and spent a whole day online checking out recipes for cut out cookies.  What else would you suggest I do with a box of 100 cookie cutters? 

Last year, well, the year before I SHOULD say, we made these cookies and homemade frosting and did the whole shebang.  It was fun AND delicious and Harley has been asking since to do it again.  Well, I had gestational diabetes last holiday season.  I don't recommend that basically... so because my husband is not a dick, he decided against any baking and promised we will doubly make it up this year.

And we already ARE!  Yay!  He got the few missing ingredients, because my cupboards are bake-tastic and tonight I make the dough and fridge it for baking tomorrow.  Then I will set out my little bowls and do different colored frostings so we can make the dinos green and fire trucks red and so on...

It's going to be a blast and I am sure we won't spend ALL day doing it, so I'm trying to figure out what else we can do other than clean.  But the obvious Go To here is clean. 

My house is not clean. It's not clean to my standards anyways.  It's no one's fault but our own.  And by ours I mean MINE.  Last year I was pretty much depressed during the last part of my pregnancy.  Getting the GD during the holidays really messed with me.  My days were so incredibly boring with the eating the same old thing day in and day out, telling time by what I ate and when and taking my blood sugar.  I realize people do this all the time, but I was pregnant and FULL of hormones... WAAAAYYY too many hormones...  My F.I.L was dying...  I wondered if would be able to see Marysu.. I wanted him to so badly.. and he did.  That's an answered prayed... check...  Choni was still trying to get piddly jobs... and he was dealing with his dad and with me and worrying about me and the unborn.  Harley was doing her first year in 1st grade, her first year with REAL homework and REAL schoolyard play and what-not.  I stopped caring about the house... Choni tried so hard to keep up with everything.  Things are okay, but I used to keep the house up better when I cared.  So now, baby is out, we are getting a new routine going now that we are not rushing to the inlaws every weekend to spend time while we have it.  It's more like, we go to keep Gma company.  And soon she won't necessarily require that anymore...  like tomorrow.  She is SO busy with things she is doing we are skipping our weekend trip.

That is really good news.  That means she is coping really well...  Which is great... I am so happy for her.  I am happy for me too, cause now I clean my house...  a step at a time. I am not climbing Everest in a day.  We need to clean the inside and outside of our windows, I need to clean out the tracks of the sliding windows and doors... I need to mop and sweep and vacuum, but into the cracks of things.  I can't tell you the last time the "cracks" were done.  It's been awhile.  I used to get in the bathrooms and scrub the floors on my hands and knees... Haven't done that in a while...

I wonder how I did all this the "last time"... you know, with Harley.
Well, I didn't.
I lived with my in-laws and everything was, "Oh no, you sit there, I'll do it..."
"Oh no, I'll change the baby, you finish up whatever you were doing..."
and so on.
It was awesome... and I didn't have to do any of my own housework until Harley was a year old and we moved.  Then I started cleaning again.  But Harley at 1 year is NOT the same as any Harley before. 

I figured it would happen this way, so I haven't been letting it get to me too badly.  I used to clean the house on the days that Harley went to Gma and Gpa's house and spent the night.  But she doesn't do that anymore, I'm not sure how that's going to work, but we'll figure it out.  Now I need to do what most people do...figure out how to clean the house with both kids in the house :)  Yay!  Ahem, Sarcasm...

But as with all things, we'll figure it out.  We always do...and I know that.  Which is another reason why I try not to let things bother me like they do.  Because we always figure it out.  And now that I have said that twice too many, I will look forward to the day when I can set the kids down to do what will keep them busy long enough to clean something... it's coming soon I can feel it. 

I already put the baby gate up in their room and locked Harley and Marysu in there to play.  It worked pretty well until Marysu realized I wasn't in there with them anymore.  That was not happy making for her.  I went in there and cleaned and it worked pretty well that way.  SO now I know I can tackle their room with them in there.  Battle: WON!! 

It seems like we are days from Mary's 1st bday.  It's her fault.  She's growing up too damned fast...  Dammit...  She eats foods...  she has 6 teeth... she stands... she tries to walk...  she baby-babble-talks...  I almost want to tell her to "get up and get it yourself"...  She wore an actual outfit for the first time yesterday because it was cold for the first time yesterday...  she looked so grown up **sad face** 

Now that I have gone on way too long...  I leave you with this...  Marysu's dance song...