Some genius somewhere decided that there weren't enough flicks about Hitchcock...and then decided that two flick should come out at the same time.
Saw them both...liked one better than the other, hands down...and of course, it lead to THIS discussion:
So what if a movie was made about the making of "The Shining"?
Oh shit...
And who would play who?
We're glad you asked.
Stanley Kubrick: Dominic Cooper
Stephen King: Nicholas Hoult
Jack Nicholson: Christian Slater
Shelley Duvall: Rebecca Hall
Scatman Crothers: Mario Van Peebles
Joe Turkel (Lloyd The Bartender): Burn Gorman or Joseph Gordon Levitt Or James Franco (ok now we're just having too much fun)
and so on and so forth for the rest of the cast because the film would really be focusing on Kubrick's day to day dealings with the cast...and who are the actual cast members he would dealing with the most? So there you have it...your cinematic earwig for the rest of whatever. Oh wait... now imagine if it was written by Aaron Sorkin... And now you want to watch it!!
Saturday, December 21, 2013
When in Doubt, Back To The Drawing Board...
I have been saying that ALOT lately...
Back to the drawing board...and of course, I say it in my head in the fashion of Wyle E. Coyote... Cause it's funny...
I got a book from my Guria for my birthday...and with that book (cause she knows me) was another book... blank pages of an unwritten confession..so she says... and she's not wrong. I miss it. I do. I miss my daily entries... and I told myself, I would return to them when I was ready. My hiatus is nearly to an end. My carpel tunnel, however...is not...thank Jebus for wrist supports...
I almost gave into a version of myself that takes up about 4% real estate of my brain... that version of myself thinks that they can take a Smash journal and use it over a nice long span of time... when in reality, the MOST of my brain would probably finish that damn thing in a week... or less... less is more likely...
Fuck me... even typing hurts now...and since I can't win...I'm just going to go back to writing...
After being in Michaels and seeing all those beautiful journals in all their various allowance glory... I realized something...I had it down... I had it down to my personality already. I didn't need glitz, and tabs, and stickers, (well maybe stickers) and labels and shit... basically a scrapbook... I don't like scrapbooks... I find myself taking them too seriously...and then they don't get finished...or they DO get finished, but then they mean as much to me as that paper I wrote three hours before it was due, receiving a mediocrely deserved A- in the process...
I was crocheting yet ANOTHER late entry into my Christmas list of giving, dug deep to fish a pencil out of my awesome Owl Tote Ma got me as a early Christmas-present-just-cause-I-got-a-killer-ass-deal-at-Old-navy kind of thing... I found the pencil..inside the awesome, blue embossed covered journal my Guria got me for my bday..still empty...and it didn't bother me that it was empty before...but it bothered me today...and just today I had all these things come up... with seeing the Smash journals at Hobby Lobby and then again at Michael's...had a chat about my bajillion journals at the foot of my closet...and then finding something I hadn't seen in 5 months... probably because I subconsciously hid it so I wouldn't feel it's eyes boring into the back of my skull... So, since typing kills me anyways, and I think maybe some of my inspriations I had when I started doing this might come back to me in the process...I think it's time to end my hiatus from the journaling. It's too coincidental, don't you think? I think so too...
Speaking of back to the drawing board...I think I finally found a liquid homemade laundry soap that goes well with cold water recipe for us to try. We are both on board with the experiment, and with a half bottle of brand soap to go, it's time to fish or cut bait... or insert your own decision making analogy here...
On the list of DIY's... No Poo...yes I know... I'm gonna try it. I have a need for head n shoulders and I'm wondering if I perpetuate the need because of all the crap in the shampoo and conditioner ... so I'm gonna try the homemade stuff and see what happens. It's winter, it's the perfect time to try it because I can wear hats during the Dirty Thirty Day trial period that I have been reassured is going to happen. I have organic coconut oil at hand for dryness... I'm excited to try this. if it works for me and I can get it down to a science, I will be introducing it to Choners and the Things... yay!! Got to see my bestie from Sin City today and not for long enough... *sad face*... but she'll never move back here and I'll NEVER EVER move my ass there... so it's one of those things that I gotta get over... and I'm over it. Doesn't mean I can't be sad about it once it awhile, right? Right! Christmas countdown is underweigh and for the slimness of the giving and receiving, it's gonna be an awesome Christmas. I can already feel it being one mostly of the reason of the season and less about the commercializing of the season... wa-hoo.
In a nutshell...feeling very "back to the drawing board"...but ... in the BEST way possible. Super uber refreshing way possible...even Fallon and Timberlake are taking it back to the drawing board. I must be on to something... Next obsession on my list... my new camera lens.. My lil cuz is amazing and I'm DYING to get my lens. I might even get a flash... with a dome diffuser... but that's...another story...
Back to the drawing board...and of course, I say it in my head in the fashion of Wyle E. Coyote... Cause it's funny...
I got a book from my Guria for my birthday...and with that book (cause she knows me) was another book... blank pages of an unwritten confession..so she says... and she's not wrong. I miss it. I do. I miss my daily entries... and I told myself, I would return to them when I was ready. My hiatus is nearly to an end. My carpel tunnel, however...is not...thank Jebus for wrist supports...
I almost gave into a version of myself that takes up about 4% real estate of my brain... that version of myself thinks that they can take a Smash journal and use it over a nice long span of time... when in reality, the MOST of my brain would probably finish that damn thing in a week... or less... less is more likely...
Fuck me... even typing hurts now...and since I can't win...I'm just going to go back to writing...
After being in Michaels and seeing all those beautiful journals in all their various allowance glory... I realized something...I had it down... I had it down to my personality already. I didn't need glitz, and tabs, and stickers, (well maybe stickers) and labels and shit... basically a scrapbook... I don't like scrapbooks... I find myself taking them too seriously...and then they don't get finished...or they DO get finished, but then they mean as much to me as that paper I wrote three hours before it was due, receiving a mediocrely deserved A- in the process...
I was crocheting yet ANOTHER late entry into my Christmas list of giving, dug deep to fish a pencil out of my awesome Owl Tote Ma got me as a early Christmas-present-just-cause-I-got-a-killer-ass-deal-at-Old-navy kind of thing... I found the pencil..inside the awesome, blue embossed covered journal my Guria got me for my bday..still empty...and it didn't bother me that it was empty before...but it bothered me today...and just today I had all these things come up... with seeing the Smash journals at Hobby Lobby and then again at Michael's...had a chat about my bajillion journals at the foot of my closet...and then finding something I hadn't seen in 5 months... probably because I subconsciously hid it so I wouldn't feel it's eyes boring into the back of my skull... So, since typing kills me anyways, and I think maybe some of my inspriations I had when I started doing this might come back to me in the process...I think it's time to end my hiatus from the journaling. It's too coincidental, don't you think? I think so too...
Speaking of back to the drawing board...I think I finally found a liquid homemade laundry soap that goes well with cold water recipe for us to try. We are both on board with the experiment, and with a half bottle of brand soap to go, it's time to fish or cut bait... or insert your own decision making analogy here...
On the list of DIY's... No Poo...yes I know... I'm gonna try it. I have a need for head n shoulders and I'm wondering if I perpetuate the need because of all the crap in the shampoo and conditioner ... so I'm gonna try the homemade stuff and see what happens. It's winter, it's the perfect time to try it because I can wear hats during the Dirty Thirty Day trial period that I have been reassured is going to happen. I have organic coconut oil at hand for dryness... I'm excited to try this. if it works for me and I can get it down to a science, I will be introducing it to Choners and the Things... yay!! Got to see my bestie from Sin City today and not for long enough... *sad face*... but she'll never move back here and I'll NEVER EVER move my ass there... so it's one of those things that I gotta get over... and I'm over it. Doesn't mean I can't be sad about it once it awhile, right? Right! Christmas countdown is underweigh and for the slimness of the giving and receiving, it's gonna be an awesome Christmas. I can already feel it being one mostly of the reason of the season and less about the commercializing of the season... wa-hoo.
In a nutshell...feeling very "back to the drawing board"...but ... in the BEST way possible. Super uber refreshing way possible...even Fallon and Timberlake are taking it back to the drawing board. I must be on to something... Next obsession on my list... my new camera lens.. My lil cuz is amazing and I'm DYING to get my lens. I might even get a flash... with a dome diffuser... but that's...another story...
Friday, November 22, 2013
♪Oh The Weather Outside Is Weather...♪
I have been crafting up a storm and the man has been baking cookies fresh for Thing 1's lunches... peanut butter oatmeal. Yum! Cookies make the house warm and it smells like the holidays already! Generally I am ALL about making room for Thanksgiving so it doesn't feel like the redheaded stepchild of the holiday season, but this year man, it just seems like we need the OOMPH into Christmas. Luckily for me, I have never had decorations for Thanksgiving and the stores decided to lump Halloween and Thanksgiving together this year. Amazingly enough, I now have Thanksgiving décor due to the storewide "fall" clearances that did the lumping together! Haha!
Ma and her man are doing well...we like him. He might be around for Thanksgiving... hope so... he's fun. It's going to be a small Thanksgiving this year, much like Christmas. I'm just glad I finished shopping already. I get to sit back and enjoy now. Generally, what we do is take the Friday after Thanksgiving to decorate like so many people I'm sure do. This year, I'm jumping the gun...and get this...at the request of Choners...he is usually VERY adamant about giving Turkey Day it's due. Well, this year, he wants his cake and he's going to eat it too... Next Monday, whether the big one goes to day care or not, we are doing our Christmas décor. It's something to pass the time and we might have Knott's plans on Saturday... but until that is certain I don't want to make any plans in stone. So I say, the general idea will be to get out the Christmas awesomeness for Monday... and if Thing 1 goes, she will come home to a winter wonderland in the house :) Also, I am planning on lights outside this year! Shhh, don't tell Mister...
This weekend is family weekend, we're gonna see a lot of his family :) I say his family, but they're really OUR family...It's funny, I just wanted to specify WHICH side of the family, mine or his... I could say The Brown side... But really, that doesn't help... us Irish have been known to have the fever. So both sides are relatively brown.. hehehe...
Tuesday is Christmas pictures... I have been saying, I want to make more image heavy posts, but I haven't yet. I think because I don't plan them THAT far ahead... so it's hard to do. Also, I love my camera. I love it SO much I'm afraid to leave the house with it... I know.. shut up... I got a filter for it to protect the lens so perhaps I would feel better about letting it bang around my back pack... wrapped in a scarf... and maybe a sweater.
Next years tax return already has a portion dedicated to my new lens. My cousin Ace is in "the business" and he helped me out HUGE on shopping around for my next lens purchase... And the more Choni is working on his film project the more I think he will probably want to use the Nikon for projects... A new lens wouldn't hurt! Ace said that my camera body and specs are great, I should be getting great results when I put the new lens on ...next year...
I am LOVING the weather...cold. I love cold. Snuggles, soup, hot cocoa, coffee NOT for my morning commute... aaaahhhh... Blankets on the couches... I LOVE blankets... kid snuggles... and when the decorations go up...the soft warm glow of the tree... oh yeah... that's the stuff....
Today is my last work day of November and I start my staycation... Thing 1 asked if I had any time off that overlapped HER time off...so I made some... cause sometimes, you just have to. I hope this allergy/cold thing goes away... Maybe with a little help from my friends Alka Seltzer and Nyquil...
Too bad there's not a way to make people leave comments... I want comments...
Ma and her man are doing well...we like him. He might be around for Thanksgiving... hope so... he's fun. It's going to be a small Thanksgiving this year, much like Christmas. I'm just glad I finished shopping already. I get to sit back and enjoy now. Generally, what we do is take the Friday after Thanksgiving to decorate like so many people I'm sure do. This year, I'm jumping the gun...and get this...at the request of Choners...he is usually VERY adamant about giving Turkey Day it's due. Well, this year, he wants his cake and he's going to eat it too... Next Monday, whether the big one goes to day care or not, we are doing our Christmas décor. It's something to pass the time and we might have Knott's plans on Saturday... but until that is certain I don't want to make any plans in stone. So I say, the general idea will be to get out the Christmas awesomeness for Monday... and if Thing 1 goes, she will come home to a winter wonderland in the house :) Also, I am planning on lights outside this year! Shhh, don't tell Mister...
This weekend is family weekend, we're gonna see a lot of his family :) I say his family, but they're really OUR family...It's funny, I just wanted to specify WHICH side of the family, mine or his... I could say The Brown side... But really, that doesn't help... us Irish have been known to have the fever. So both sides are relatively brown.. hehehe...
Tuesday is Christmas pictures... I have been saying, I want to make more image heavy posts, but I haven't yet. I think because I don't plan them THAT far ahead... so it's hard to do. Also, I love my camera. I love it SO much I'm afraid to leave the house with it... I know.. shut up... I got a filter for it to protect the lens so perhaps I would feel better about letting it bang around my back pack... wrapped in a scarf... and maybe a sweater.
Next years tax return already has a portion dedicated to my new lens. My cousin Ace is in "the business" and he helped me out HUGE on shopping around for my next lens purchase... And the more Choni is working on his film project the more I think he will probably want to use the Nikon for projects... A new lens wouldn't hurt! Ace said that my camera body and specs are great, I should be getting great results when I put the new lens on ...next year...
I am LOVING the weather...cold. I love cold. Snuggles, soup, hot cocoa, coffee NOT for my morning commute... aaaahhhh... Blankets on the couches... I LOVE blankets... kid snuggles... and when the decorations go up...the soft warm glow of the tree... oh yeah... that's the stuff....
Today is my last work day of November and I start my staycation... Thing 1 asked if I had any time off that overlapped HER time off...so I made some... cause sometimes, you just have to. I hope this allergy/cold thing goes away... Maybe with a little help from my friends Alka Seltzer and Nyquil...
Too bad there's not a way to make people leave comments... I want comments...
I'm Better at Stalking...
I have been keeping up with READING the blogs I follow... reciprocation has been more difficult...
This is what happens to US when the economy tanks and slowly comes back on line...and by slowly, I mean I don't think that there is an instrument that can measure the slowness... THAT's how slow...
I can be so busy I work through lunch one day, and the next day I can be completely dead and begging for work to do... I always have work to do, it's like home...when in doubt, clean. Here it's the same basic principle... You just need to know what and where to clean. Know that, and there will always be something to do. Such is life, eh? Yup, I think so, too.
The past two months have been unreal busy...just as I said. It's amazing, because the time I feel I have the most to say I am unable to say anything because I am sitting here with visions of V-Tech toys dancing through my head... not really... My Christmas shopping is finished. Just two things to pick up when they arrive at the store and I'm DONE. Because Christmas is thin this year.
I can't believe how quick it came up on us, and I say that every year, but I really mean it this year. And I'll really mean it next year, and ten years from now. I swear... I totally swear.. like... totally.
I have the dreaded second birthday coming up of Thing 2...and not just any second birthday, the last second birthday I will throw...so do I throw one? do I do something at home in the backyard? Do I say "Hey Clan, who wants to meet us at (insert pizza place with games here) on such a day at such a time?" and see who shows up? I have NO friggin clue... Not a single damned one... dammit...
So instead of freaking out about it, I'm just gonna leave it alone for now. I have too many things. My weekends are filling up fast and I am increasingly ecstatic about the fact I found the planner I did when I did. Otherwise I'd have post it notes where plans should be and that would be a disaster... mentally more than anything else, but still...It would be there...bahaha...
Everyone's doing really well...Thing 1 is bringing us to a place where just when we think maybe she's not doing as well in school as we once thought, BOOM... nope, we get the great behavior report followed up by the awesome AR testing report and we put those worries to beddy-bye...
Thing 2... Jesus pleezus... She's crazy. I mean it, she's NUTS... she just runs around the house with her little blahblahblah language and talks to you like she's just having herself a conversation you never knew you were in the middle of. Then there's the whole breaking the crib thing...she broke the crib...she is SO not ready for a bed yet, not even a toddler bed...she would be crawling up into Thing 1's bed and head butting her to instigate a playtime at midnight....so we are totally NOT doing this bed training thing yet...that being said, we are need of a new crib. So I have my eye out on one that's atleast half what I paid for this one new...I don't need the mattress, just the crib...it's not safe for her to have it the way it is now and it really freaks me out... no matter how many zip ties or nails or screws you use, there's always that mom gut thing that makes you think, FUCK THIS, I NEED A NEW ONE... and that mom gut is applied to so many things... I don't mess with the mom gut.
Speaking of mom guts, mine is pretty much gone ;) I am down 10 pounds and I have another 10 before I get to where I was before thing 1 was a twinkle in our eyes...another 10 pounds after that and I'll be perfecto...right at the place I need to be period.the end. So that's a nice sentiment. And now my rings fall off....shit.
And to celebrate my awesome personal triumph, I cut my hair off... pixie cuts are huge right now, and no it's never been my way to follow the herd (baaaa n shit) but my hurr... oy vay.
I highlighted it...fine...it was great...fine...I stopped the affordability on it...had to stop...fine...so I did... and then I had bleached ends...meh. I covered them with wash-out brown...fine...worked for a little while but it's still crunchy feeling... meh.
Stop the color, stop the bleach and the crunchy... cut the hair. Done... looks freakin sweet and I can't believe I didn't talk myself into this sooner. As much as I feel that having long hair is something I owe the "bad hair" community, I am sorry all you thin stringy hair'd folk...but long hair thick hair is NOT awesome...Looks great, I'm not denying that fact... but it sucks to have it on your head, on your shoulders and then there's that whole "I Don't Like Things Hanging Off My Body" syndrome... haven't heard of it yet? really? It's new... I have it...with a vengeance.
Until they make a pill for that, I will not have a purse, a child, a scarf, hair, bags, whatnot hanging off my body at anytime. This is why I don't let my kids pull on my person, I carry a backpack not a purse and why if I am carrying bags from the car to the house...of who am I kidding...if I can help it I NEVER CARRY BAGS FROM THE CAR TO THE HOUSE! Carpel tunnel and IDLTHOMB syndrome are why.
<END RANT>
<NEW RANT>
Unless I'm missing some mystical, cosmic, universal message...me n the significant other are awesome fantasticness... Ever have those friends that were like, in marital distress... and people were like, "Oh shit, are they gonna make it?" Yeah, I had those too... friends...family... whoever... Well, we haven't had that. Ever. I just realized that the other day when I recently heard of a split. Knew the couple fairly well... and BOOM... split. It was a surprise to her, too, turns out. Pretty sad when I think of it. Made me think of me n Choners... and I came to that conclusion. I don't know, makes me pretty proud to think of that. I mean, no I don't have a BA in bullshit from FU... but I take pride in my family...my marriage...Which is probably why we are in the 13th year of couple-dom and nearing the 11th anniversary of our engagement, and the 10th anniversary of marriage is next April...
I was thinking that we should do something special and when I mentioned it to the mister and said, We should do something for our anniversary next year (which we NEVER EVER do)" and he nods...and then he thinks...and then he says "Why next year? What's so special about next year?" And when I tell him it'll be TEN whole years...oh the look on his face...so adorable I could have just died....
I still look at that face and see the baby face I met when I was 19... I was 22 (going on 23) when we got married. I know plenty of people who were married younger than that...but ask me how many of them are STILL married?? Go ahead...ASK ME... not much...
Not that I want to turn this into a bragging session, but I'll tell you what...My foot still hurts, I found out I have TMJ and the mouthguard is too expensive to buy right now so I go to bed with Motrin every other night...My allergies have been taking this opportunity of our weird weather to SHIT all over me and make me miserable and the TMJ is now causing tension headaches and tension in my neck and shoulders comes and goes... I am doing little exercises at my desk all day to curb this. My dentist basically told me my teeth are just BAD and if I want to continue eating food that I need to brush and floss after every meal and use a special rinse that helps decrease the dry mouth I have as a direct result of taking antihistamines which I cannot function without.
My point is this... I take the things that are awesome and going RAD and focus on them 100% because there is enough SHIT to balance them out...Trust & believe...It's NOT ALL wine and roses...but when I sit back after doing shit ton of crap work and think about going home to my hunnies... it makes things better... and it makes things better because my mister makes ME better... being a good mom to the kiddos makes me want to be a better person...and then sometimes kids are just assholes... They just are...and I think sometimes what you need to do is realize that, walk away, and pick up somewhere fresh in the morning.. That's what works for us so far!
Yay! Basically, balance. Everything is... balanced... There's good to outweigh the bad and sometimes, the opposite is true. To wrap it up (as if that's at all possible with me) my foot hurts, my jaw hurts, my mouth forever tastes of toothpaste and flavored floss and my husband is all kinds of MAD awesomeness...and I think I'll keep the kids, too. Aloha.
This is what happens to US when the economy tanks and slowly comes back on line...and by slowly, I mean I don't think that there is an instrument that can measure the slowness... THAT's how slow...
I can be so busy I work through lunch one day, and the next day I can be completely dead and begging for work to do... I always have work to do, it's like home...when in doubt, clean. Here it's the same basic principle... You just need to know what and where to clean. Know that, and there will always be something to do. Such is life, eh? Yup, I think so, too.
The past two months have been unreal busy...just as I said. It's amazing, because the time I feel I have the most to say I am unable to say anything because I am sitting here with visions of V-Tech toys dancing through my head... not really... My Christmas shopping is finished. Just two things to pick up when they arrive at the store and I'm DONE. Because Christmas is thin this year.
I can't believe how quick it came up on us, and I say that every year, but I really mean it this year. And I'll really mean it next year, and ten years from now. I swear... I totally swear.. like... totally.
I have the dreaded second birthday coming up of Thing 2...and not just any second birthday, the last second birthday I will throw...so do I throw one? do I do something at home in the backyard? Do I say "Hey Clan, who wants to meet us at (insert pizza place with games here) on such a day at such a time?" and see who shows up? I have NO friggin clue... Not a single damned one... dammit...
So instead of freaking out about it, I'm just gonna leave it alone for now. I have too many things. My weekends are filling up fast and I am increasingly ecstatic about the fact I found the planner I did when I did. Otherwise I'd have post it notes where plans should be and that would be a disaster... mentally more than anything else, but still...It would be there...bahaha...
Everyone's doing really well...Thing 1 is bringing us to a place where just when we think maybe she's not doing as well in school as we once thought, BOOM... nope, we get the great behavior report followed up by the awesome AR testing report and we put those worries to beddy-bye...
Thing 2... Jesus pleezus... She's crazy. I mean it, she's NUTS... she just runs around the house with her little blahblahblah language and talks to you like she's just having herself a conversation you never knew you were in the middle of. Then there's the whole breaking the crib thing...she broke the crib...she is SO not ready for a bed yet, not even a toddler bed...she would be crawling up into Thing 1's bed and head butting her to instigate a playtime at midnight....so we are totally NOT doing this bed training thing yet...that being said, we are need of a new crib. So I have my eye out on one that's atleast half what I paid for this one new...I don't need the mattress, just the crib...it's not safe for her to have it the way it is now and it really freaks me out... no matter how many zip ties or nails or screws you use, there's always that mom gut thing that makes you think, FUCK THIS, I NEED A NEW ONE... and that mom gut is applied to so many things... I don't mess with the mom gut.
Speaking of mom guts, mine is pretty much gone ;) I am down 10 pounds and I have another 10 before I get to where I was before thing 1 was a twinkle in our eyes...another 10 pounds after that and I'll be perfecto...right at the place I need to be period.the end. So that's a nice sentiment. And now my rings fall off....shit.
And to celebrate my awesome personal triumph, I cut my hair off... pixie cuts are huge right now, and no it's never been my way to follow the herd (baaaa n shit) but my hurr... oy vay.
I highlighted it...fine...it was great...fine...I stopped the affordability on it...had to stop...fine...so I did... and then I had bleached ends...meh. I covered them with wash-out brown...fine...worked for a little while but it's still crunchy feeling... meh.
Stop the color, stop the bleach and the crunchy... cut the hair. Done... looks freakin sweet and I can't believe I didn't talk myself into this sooner. As much as I feel that having long hair is something I owe the "bad hair" community, I am sorry all you thin stringy hair'd folk...but long hair thick hair is NOT awesome...Looks great, I'm not denying that fact... but it sucks to have it on your head, on your shoulders and then there's that whole "I Don't Like Things Hanging Off My Body" syndrome... haven't heard of it yet? really? It's new... I have it...with a vengeance.
Until they make a pill for that, I will not have a purse, a child, a scarf, hair, bags, whatnot hanging off my body at anytime. This is why I don't let my kids pull on my person, I carry a backpack not a purse and why if I am carrying bags from the car to the house...of who am I kidding...if I can help it I NEVER CARRY BAGS FROM THE CAR TO THE HOUSE! Carpel tunnel and IDLTHOMB syndrome are why.
<END RANT>
<NEW RANT>
Unless I'm missing some mystical, cosmic, universal message...me n the significant other are awesome fantasticness... Ever have those friends that were like, in marital distress... and people were like, "Oh shit, are they gonna make it?" Yeah, I had those too... friends...family... whoever... Well, we haven't had that. Ever. I just realized that the other day when I recently heard of a split. Knew the couple fairly well... and BOOM... split. It was a surprise to her, too, turns out. Pretty sad when I think of it. Made me think of me n Choners... and I came to that conclusion. I don't know, makes me pretty proud to think of that. I mean, no I don't have a BA in bullshit from FU... but I take pride in my family...my marriage...Which is probably why we are in the 13th year of couple-dom and nearing the 11th anniversary of our engagement, and the 10th anniversary of marriage is next April...
I was thinking that we should do something special and when I mentioned it to the mister and said, We should do something for our anniversary next year (which we NEVER EVER do)" and he nods...and then he thinks...and then he says "Why next year? What's so special about next year?" And when I tell him it'll be TEN whole years...oh the look on his face...so adorable I could have just died....
I still look at that face and see the baby face I met when I was 19... I was 22 (going on 23) when we got married. I know plenty of people who were married younger than that...but ask me how many of them are STILL married?? Go ahead...ASK ME... not much...
Not that I want to turn this into a bragging session, but I'll tell you what...My foot still hurts, I found out I have TMJ and the mouthguard is too expensive to buy right now so I go to bed with Motrin every other night...My allergies have been taking this opportunity of our weird weather to SHIT all over me and make me miserable and the TMJ is now causing tension headaches and tension in my neck and shoulders comes and goes... I am doing little exercises at my desk all day to curb this. My dentist basically told me my teeth are just BAD and if I want to continue eating food that I need to brush and floss after every meal and use a special rinse that helps decrease the dry mouth I have as a direct result of taking antihistamines which I cannot function without.
My point is this... I take the things that are awesome and going RAD and focus on them 100% because there is enough SHIT to balance them out...Trust & believe...It's NOT ALL wine and roses...but when I sit back after doing shit ton of crap work and think about going home to my hunnies... it makes things better... and it makes things better because my mister makes ME better... being a good mom to the kiddos makes me want to be a better person...and then sometimes kids are just assholes... They just are...and I think sometimes what you need to do is realize that, walk away, and pick up somewhere fresh in the morning.. That's what works for us so far!
Yay! Basically, balance. Everything is... balanced... There's good to outweigh the bad and sometimes, the opposite is true. To wrap it up (as if that's at all possible with me) my foot hurts, my jaw hurts, my mouth forever tastes of toothpaste and flavored floss and my husband is all kinds of MAD awesomeness...and I think I'll keep the kids, too. Aloha.
Monday, September 30, 2013
Third One's the Charm!!!
I know most OCD people feel that even numbers are the way to go, but I am Irish...and superstitious is the name of the game. So Threes... we like the Three's... It's all about the Three's...
Fine... well I just wanted to do a random post about our month... We have had a really busy month.
Again, work is picking up, I am no longer able to sit and mull and write and jot down things to write about later. I will probably require more structure if I want to keep doing the blog thing because as much as I want to keep writing in my journal, but wrists are killing at the end of writing anything with pen and paper... this KILLS me you MUST know that... Also, there are things I like to say and get out of my head and put on paper...why? Don't know, but it works... It helps, it really does.
Going day to day is how I'm trying to do it right now, which really is at odds with the planner in me. The planner in me is so strong that I even bought a two and a half year planner over the weekend. It's a Snoopy planner, don't get me wrong...one month per two pages....but still... If I don't write it down I forget. Plain and simple...
My uncle gave me a hutch, and it was my grandma's and now it's mine. It was missing some shelves, so I got glass pieces cut for the shelves, and now I have another hutch and I have space for more stuff... yay!! I got some really cute knickknacks out that I had put away... Amazing... 4 years later and we are still "settling in"... it's so awesome... We have been doing alot of that this month. Moving things around, making room, filling in spaces... So warm and lovely to have everything in it's place...and to put it there together... side by side... I've been a romantical ball of puke lately...not sure what that's about...but it's true... I am living a RAD Nora Roberts style life when it comes to that man.... I'm NOT ashamed to admit it.. Even when I have to clean up toe nail clippings.. I don't care!
I had a very particular idea in mind for the kids for Halloween and as awesome an idea as it was, I don't think we'll be able to pull it off without me sinking a little more attention into it than I want to give. I just want to go get costumes and go home... sometimes simple is just the best way! Choni is growing his hair out... he's been working on some side projects, keeping himself busy. Even though he just got a kick in the ass cause he's really into deciphering his dreams... and they almost always mean something and it's always something incredibly relevant. Unfortunately, his dream told him that nothing will come of any of his side projects...Not sure what that is supposed to mean for him, but I'm thinking that even though they can be "right" they're still wrong. He is doing his side projects just as much to keep himself busy and not feel the need to vacuum an already vacuumed carpet AGAIN... I told him not to get discouraged cause I wanted him to keep going... Maybe they'll pay off later down the road even... Anything that he has for himself that he does is a good accomplishment...and that makes ME happy for him :) Yay!
I am back to doing my nails...they grew out over night it seems and now I guess I have to take care of them, gosh oh gee...whatever will I do?! Give Choni back scratches, for one...
Our now 20 month old is doing all the things that 20 month olds do... some think she should be speaking full sentences... Nah, I'm good...she's fine. She eats everything and anything, so I'm good on the "not talking"... really...
Before we know it I wont' be buying diapers and wipes anymore and I'll $32 a month back into the budget... Before we know it... geesh...
With the fantastic weather change I have been taking my walks at lunch again... It's so refreshing to get out of the office, and even so our stuffy little cave we have been sanctioned off into... Of course, it can always be a little cooler for my walks, but I'm not about to look the gift horse in the mouth... Thank you Fall, thank you so much for showing up when you did! I thought they were going to have to start rolling me into the building! Thankfully my Vegas bff decided to get super skinny and gifted me her old pants...ALL of them... So now, I have new pants! I LOVE hand overs! And now I have an even better reason to stay the same or try to get a little MORE healthy... I LOVE all my new pants!!! And soda... I love soda... so I gotta do my walks.
I SHOULD be doing better anyways. I don't eat ALL my dinner. We are still on a budget, so budget for food too... The average person eats too much at a time anyways, so we have snacks for the kids and they eat their dinner. Daddy's average dinner feeds us all and then there's nothing left. I feed the wee one off my plate and that way I don't overstuff myself.. I use a juice glass to serve myself my dr. pepper out of a 2 liter bottle, no more individual cans for me. Sometimes I need a pick me up at work and I'll get a D.P from the machine... not always... just sometimes... so my consumption has gone down that's for sure... Nothing, short of Diabetes, will change that any time soon.
Oh, Thing 1...Another thing that has kept my brain completely terrified, and preoccupied... She needs SO much dental work... I should have been taking her to a periodontal this whole time and I didn't... and when they told me what all she needed done to her mouth I wanted to crawl into a hole and die... cause a dead me would be better for her than a half assed me...which is what I felt like. Losing teeth is one of those things that does NOT happen at different times, per kid, per case. You lose them at the same time, period. If you're neighbor's kids, and your kid's classmates are all losing teeth, you're kid should be losing them too...that's it... boom, done. So, she has teeth she didn't lose and now her adult teeth are going to come in crooked and we'll be hip deep in braces and dental work for the rest of her adolescence probably... well, I guess as long as I know that now right? yeah, right... she brushes, she flosses..she doesn't drink soda or eat candy... well, she really doesn't... and she's still doomed... awesome.
Been reading a lot of books... Can't believe how many I burned through in the past month... Seriously! I read...6 books...and that's just between here and there, imagine what I could do with TIME on my hands?? I finished a baby blanket, I want to start another and I have some Xmas gifts to get started on... I finally got a handle on the kids room and organizing that mess... YAY!!! I should get the toy net hammock thingies I ordered on Amazon in a few more days and then it's ON... ReOrganize 2013 will be happening! They need new curtains for their room, other than that their room is perfecto.
The hair is going to grow out, I decided this. I am no longer getting hair cuts, they have stopped and I am no longer going in for color. Too 'spensive. I did notice that the toner wore off, so the bleached parts were coming up yellow. I put a washout over it so it toned it down. Worked like a CHARM! So now I just have to grow this mess out. When it's a certain length, I will have some layers pulled through..but it needs to be LOOONG before that happens cause I already know what I want to do with it...it just seems like I seriously owe the people of the world that don't have rad hair... I owe them this, to grow mine out and let my awesome hair flag fly... and it is awesome... it's soft, it's thick, it's Purdy...it's wavy... it can be straight, it can be curly... anything I want it to be really... and it's not turning grey, so I'm gonna sail that ship as long as I can too...
I've been car day dreaming for the next purchase, which I don't anticipate for another three years or so...unless unfortunate events strike, then sooner... but lets NOT go there shall we? Okay? Ok... Well, I DID notice, that since I've been daydreaming, that's when the shit hit the fan on the cars... Not they're in bad shape, now they're in GREAT shape...I still just... meh... it's over now... Let's now dwell...moving on? Okay... That's all really, not much else going on... Just day to day stuff... I love that we have internet now! My honey's imagination stirs much more than it has without it...so that's GREAT! I love it... I can't wait for the holidays and cool weather and pumpkin flavored everything! I already have some days off slated to be with my litto family...The big one asked if I had any days off that matched up with HER days off...aaawww... so fuck it.. I made it happen.. no rhyme or reason, sometimes you just need a week off with your hunny bunnies... Ok, rant is over... I'm done... all is well...
Fine... well I just wanted to do a random post about our month... We have had a really busy month.
Again, work is picking up, I am no longer able to sit and mull and write and jot down things to write about later. I will probably require more structure if I want to keep doing the blog thing because as much as I want to keep writing in my journal, but wrists are killing at the end of writing anything with pen and paper... this KILLS me you MUST know that... Also, there are things I like to say and get out of my head and put on paper...why? Don't know, but it works... It helps, it really does.
Going day to day is how I'm trying to do it right now, which really is at odds with the planner in me. The planner in me is so strong that I even bought a two and a half year planner over the weekend. It's a Snoopy planner, don't get me wrong...one month per two pages....but still... If I don't write it down I forget. Plain and simple...
My uncle gave me a hutch, and it was my grandma's and now it's mine. It was missing some shelves, so I got glass pieces cut for the shelves, and now I have another hutch and I have space for more stuff... yay!! I got some really cute knickknacks out that I had put away... Amazing... 4 years later and we are still "settling in"... it's so awesome... We have been doing alot of that this month. Moving things around, making room, filling in spaces... So warm and lovely to have everything in it's place...and to put it there together... side by side... I've been a romantical ball of puke lately...not sure what that's about...but it's true... I am living a RAD Nora Roberts style life when it comes to that man.... I'm NOT ashamed to admit it.. Even when I have to clean up toe nail clippings.. I don't care!
I had a very particular idea in mind for the kids for Halloween and as awesome an idea as it was, I don't think we'll be able to pull it off without me sinking a little more attention into it than I want to give. I just want to go get costumes and go home... sometimes simple is just the best way! Choni is growing his hair out... he's been working on some side projects, keeping himself busy. Even though he just got a kick in the ass cause he's really into deciphering his dreams... and they almost always mean something and it's always something incredibly relevant. Unfortunately, his dream told him that nothing will come of any of his side projects...Not sure what that is supposed to mean for him, but I'm thinking that even though they can be "right" they're still wrong. He is doing his side projects just as much to keep himself busy and not feel the need to vacuum an already vacuumed carpet AGAIN... I told him not to get discouraged cause I wanted him to keep going... Maybe they'll pay off later down the road even... Anything that he has for himself that he does is a good accomplishment...and that makes ME happy for him :) Yay!
I am back to doing my nails...they grew out over night it seems and now I guess I have to take care of them, gosh oh gee...whatever will I do?! Give Choni back scratches, for one...
Our now 20 month old is doing all the things that 20 month olds do... some think she should be speaking full sentences... Nah, I'm good...she's fine. She eats everything and anything, so I'm good on the "not talking"... really...
Before we know it I wont' be buying diapers and wipes anymore and I'll $32 a month back into the budget... Before we know it... geesh...
With the fantastic weather change I have been taking my walks at lunch again... It's so refreshing to get out of the office, and even so our stuffy little cave we have been sanctioned off into... Of course, it can always be a little cooler for my walks, but I'm not about to look the gift horse in the mouth... Thank you Fall, thank you so much for showing up when you did! I thought they were going to have to start rolling me into the building! Thankfully my Vegas bff decided to get super skinny and gifted me her old pants...ALL of them... So now, I have new pants! I LOVE hand overs! And now I have an even better reason to stay the same or try to get a little MORE healthy... I LOVE all my new pants!!! And soda... I love soda... so I gotta do my walks.
I SHOULD be doing better anyways. I don't eat ALL my dinner. We are still on a budget, so budget for food too... The average person eats too much at a time anyways, so we have snacks for the kids and they eat their dinner. Daddy's average dinner feeds us all and then there's nothing left. I feed the wee one off my plate and that way I don't overstuff myself.. I use a juice glass to serve myself my dr. pepper out of a 2 liter bottle, no more individual cans for me. Sometimes I need a pick me up at work and I'll get a D.P from the machine... not always... just sometimes... so my consumption has gone down that's for sure... Nothing, short of Diabetes, will change that any time soon.
Oh, Thing 1...Another thing that has kept my brain completely terrified, and preoccupied... She needs SO much dental work... I should have been taking her to a periodontal this whole time and I didn't... and when they told me what all she needed done to her mouth I wanted to crawl into a hole and die... cause a dead me would be better for her than a half assed me...which is what I felt like. Losing teeth is one of those things that does NOT happen at different times, per kid, per case. You lose them at the same time, period. If you're neighbor's kids, and your kid's classmates are all losing teeth, you're kid should be losing them too...that's it... boom, done. So, she has teeth she didn't lose and now her adult teeth are going to come in crooked and we'll be hip deep in braces and dental work for the rest of her adolescence probably... well, I guess as long as I know that now right? yeah, right... she brushes, she flosses..she doesn't drink soda or eat candy... well, she really doesn't... and she's still doomed... awesome.
Been reading a lot of books... Can't believe how many I burned through in the past month... Seriously! I read...6 books...and that's just between here and there, imagine what I could do with TIME on my hands?? I finished a baby blanket, I want to start another and I have some Xmas gifts to get started on... I finally got a handle on the kids room and organizing that mess... YAY!!! I should get the toy net hammock thingies I ordered on Amazon in a few more days and then it's ON... ReOrganize 2013 will be happening! They need new curtains for their room, other than that their room is perfecto.
The hair is going to grow out, I decided this. I am no longer getting hair cuts, they have stopped and I am no longer going in for color. Too 'spensive. I did notice that the toner wore off, so the bleached parts were coming up yellow. I put a washout over it so it toned it down. Worked like a CHARM! So now I just have to grow this mess out. When it's a certain length, I will have some layers pulled through..but it needs to be LOOONG before that happens cause I already know what I want to do with it...it just seems like I seriously owe the people of the world that don't have rad hair... I owe them this, to grow mine out and let my awesome hair flag fly... and it is awesome... it's soft, it's thick, it's Purdy...it's wavy... it can be straight, it can be curly... anything I want it to be really... and it's not turning grey, so I'm gonna sail that ship as long as I can too...
I've been car day dreaming for the next purchase, which I don't anticipate for another three years or so...unless unfortunate events strike, then sooner... but lets NOT go there shall we? Okay? Ok... Well, I DID notice, that since I've been daydreaming, that's when the shit hit the fan on the cars... Not they're in bad shape, now they're in GREAT shape...I still just... meh... it's over now... Let's now dwell...moving on? Okay... That's all really, not much else going on... Just day to day stuff... I love that we have internet now! My honey's imagination stirs much more than it has without it...so that's GREAT! I love it... I can't wait for the holidays and cool weather and pumpkin flavored everything! I already have some days off slated to be with my litto family...The big one asked if I had any days off that matched up with HER days off...aaawww... so fuck it.. I made it happen.. no rhyme or reason, sometimes you just need a week off with your hunny bunnies... Ok, rant is over... I'm done... all is well...
Flash Sideways...
For when it's not really a Flash Back and it's certainly NOT a Flash Forward, cause then I'd be psychic... and a lotto winner.
Some things have been creeping around in the backs of brain...the corners of my mind if you will...
I was looking back at a time when we were apartment dwellers...
When we had a psycho land lady...
Mostly due to the "Hi, I'm your house, and now that you are here, I'm going to break on you muhfuckers!!" type stuff that we've had go on this summer.
Nothing we couldn't handle... just a lot of swipe-swipe-monies-gone. Fine...
When I think about what we paid on rent, and what we paid to "fix" the problem(s)... wow... I'm still in the pink... we are still better off...and that's amazing to me. Between Homeowner's insurance, mortgage, PMI all rolled up into one beautiful payment versus what we would be paying for that space in rent... we win... so far... but still. We WIN!!! hehe... I had some serious doubts, some total almost OH my GAWD meltdowns about what had we done? What had we gotten ourselves into? First it was MY fault... cause I did this...cause I was all alone...right? Not really. I have a silent silent partner... who sometimes seems like such a silent partner, you'd think he was second cousin to Harvey The Rabbit... not so...
We made the decision to jump in when the jumping was good...and we'll still come out on top in the end...but the END is so far away... and in the END it won't be US that really truly benefits, it'll be our kids... Our house is their security.. because it's what we can do for them...and in all this "Oh my gawd what did we get ourselves into?" I remembered the who-what-where-when-why it all came about...
and I got sad...
I got a little sad cause we were so happy in our simple lives... one kid... one (and then two) car payment(s).... and then there was carrying groceries up flights of stairs because Choni thought it would be best to go that route with the kid...an upstairs apartment is less likely to get broken into...fine. I see that...
If I could have kept ANY apartment, I would have wanted to keep our first. It was lovely. It was quaint and adorable, and we had fab neighbors... except of course for that ONE neighbor... you know the one...the one neighbor you have that you know their kid's names, not from KNOWING them, but from HEARING the mom SCREAM them across the apartment complex to come home for dinner and of course you know she talks on the phone on her patio at the top of her lungs so everyone can hear about her detest for her ex... awesome, right? Right.
I miss that apartment because it was the first place we lived as a couple, an engaged couple, a married couple, and an expectant couple...that apartment had so many of our firsts... SO many... and I have so little pictures of it...and I have so little tangible memory of it... but every time we pass we tell Thing 1, that's were WE started and she recognizes it...and now SHE says it... "That's it! That's our first place!" I'm going on the technicality of Thing 1 being a zygote but still knowing that was her first home...fine... then her first actual baby outside the belly home was grandma and grandpa's...
So I remember the fun and I have fond memories, but we had some hard times also.
Here's the thing, as far as our relationship goes, me n mister are pretty damned solid especially for today's world. Also there's the whole "Relationships are work". I'm not going to say that relationships are easy, or that if they're good they're easy. They're still work. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. But it's like this:
Relationships are work. They're the kind of work you do at a job that you LOVE. You eat-sleep the job, you can't wait to get there, and you are a little sad when you leave in the afternoon but you are immediately perked back up when you realize that you get to sleep, wake up and do it all over again... aaawwww....
Then there's the bad relationship...The Relation-shit. Relationshits are work at a job you fucking hate and can't wait to get fired or have the balls to quit, but you want to get fired so you can collect unemployment and if you quit, then it's your fault you have no job...and everyone pretty much wants/needs a job right? Right...so Relationshits are jobs where you are sending your resume out on your work email cause you just.don't.give.a.fuck.
...I would like to add I am DAMN proud of that analogy...between my sister and my mom and their dating woes, I have managed to work out this here analogy between relationships and relationshits and how you know which one you're in... DAMN proud of myself... and guess which one I have???
hehehe...
Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, Flash Sideways... In remembering our past places, places of and in our past, I thought about what it must have looked like on the outside... I thought about our "times" we were having and sometimes I thought, wow, we were having a hard time, or wow, we had a down period... well, here's the thing. We WERE...but it wasn't US. What was happening was happening to US as a unit, not between the two of us. Any true unhappiness I have been apart of since I've been coupled was caused by outside forces... we were always teamed up and ready to go. So we had bummed out periods, but us, WE were good, solid. We were better than okay. But still, not bright and shiney unicorns shitting rainbows kinds of times going on...and we got through it as a unit...then I think of those times and Thing 1...and she was growing and learning during those times...she was eating on her own, she was potty training, she was speaking, thinking, learning.
Now, we have another that is speaking, thinking, learning... Not REALLY speaking, it's that "twin talk" that only we understand...but we hear it. It's there.
I say Flash Sideways because we are remembering what was going on when Thing 1 did the things that Thing 2 does... oh yeah, the apartment, apartment 2 or apartment 1? Well, if Thing 1 was born, obviously 2...oh yeah, I hated that place, the downstairs neighbors, the light in our bedroom window at night while we were TRYING to sleep, the THIS and the THAT...and then I wonder, were we EVER happy there? And then psycho's house... were we EVER happy there? And the wife part, were you unhappy with ME there? So I bring up that Mister was unhappy when we were there...and he says yeah kinda..and we talk and realize...it wasn't with eachother we had these feelings and it was all about the place and the situation not being awesome and how we DID have to try EXTRA hard to enjoy ourselves because it's NOT fun to rent someone else's house or an apartment...
Buyer's remorse? Maybe... but it comes in flashes and spurts like PTSD. (or so I imagine of course, I wouldn't really know, but it's my closest analogy)
Buying the house always trumps NOT having bought the house... I think what's happening is that so much time has passed since apartment 1 and 2 that I can look back now with fonder memories, and that's why this is so new to me. So new to think "wow, we had a good time, why did we buy a house?" but it's all relative...it's time... time passes and we sometimes forget the negative...at least I have been known to do that a time or two. I don't always WANT to remember the bad, especially if I feel like it's not going to do me any good down the road. I definitely believe in guarding yourself. that's a given in life, it's necessary to remember certain things from the past so you don't repeat.
But these flashes seem more like flash sideways to me...because when I remember these things in these places lately, Thing 2 is doing things that Thing 1 did in these past places...and I see the wee one crawl into her booster seat to eat, and I get a flash of the big one doing the same thing at the same place in a different place where we were the same family that loved eacthother the same...just in a different place... See? Sideways... Right now, it doesn't feel like I have to go BACK to remember. It feels like I just have to step to the side...
Like the eye trick, you cover one eye to see one side, and you switch eyes and you see another side. Sometimes I feel like if I cover one eye, I see here and now...and if I switch, I see then and there...
See? Sideways...
Some things have been creeping around in the backs of brain...the corners of my mind if you will...
I was looking back at a time when we were apartment dwellers...
When we had a psycho land lady...
Mostly due to the "Hi, I'm your house, and now that you are here, I'm going to break on you muhfuckers!!" type stuff that we've had go on this summer.
Nothing we couldn't handle... just a lot of swipe-swipe-monies-gone. Fine...
When I think about what we paid on rent, and what we paid to "fix" the problem(s)... wow... I'm still in the pink... we are still better off...and that's amazing to me. Between Homeowner's insurance, mortgage, PMI all rolled up into one beautiful payment versus what we would be paying for that space in rent... we win... so far... but still. We WIN!!! hehe... I had some serious doubts, some total almost OH my GAWD meltdowns about what had we done? What had we gotten ourselves into? First it was MY fault... cause I did this...cause I was all alone...right? Not really. I have a silent silent partner... who sometimes seems like such a silent partner, you'd think he was second cousin to Harvey The Rabbit... not so...
We made the decision to jump in when the jumping was good...and we'll still come out on top in the end...but the END is so far away... and in the END it won't be US that really truly benefits, it'll be our kids... Our house is their security.. because it's what we can do for them...and in all this "Oh my gawd what did we get ourselves into?" I remembered the who-what-where-when-why it all came about...
and I got sad...
I got a little sad cause we were so happy in our simple lives... one kid... one (and then two) car payment(s).... and then there was carrying groceries up flights of stairs because Choni thought it would be best to go that route with the kid...an upstairs apartment is less likely to get broken into...fine. I see that...
If I could have kept ANY apartment, I would have wanted to keep our first. It was lovely. It was quaint and adorable, and we had fab neighbors... except of course for that ONE neighbor... you know the one...the one neighbor you have that you know their kid's names, not from KNOWING them, but from HEARING the mom SCREAM them across the apartment complex to come home for dinner and of course you know she talks on the phone on her patio at the top of her lungs so everyone can hear about her detest for her ex... awesome, right? Right.
I miss that apartment because it was the first place we lived as a couple, an engaged couple, a married couple, and an expectant couple...that apartment had so many of our firsts... SO many... and I have so little pictures of it...and I have so little tangible memory of it... but every time we pass we tell Thing 1, that's were WE started and she recognizes it...and now SHE says it... "That's it! That's our first place!" I'm going on the technicality of Thing 1 being a zygote but still knowing that was her first home...fine... then her first actual baby outside the belly home was grandma and grandpa's...
So I remember the fun and I have fond memories, but we had some hard times also.
Here's the thing, as far as our relationship goes, me n mister are pretty damned solid especially for today's world. Also there's the whole "Relationships are work". I'm not going to say that relationships are easy, or that if they're good they're easy. They're still work. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. But it's like this:
Relationships are work. They're the kind of work you do at a job that you LOVE. You eat-sleep the job, you can't wait to get there, and you are a little sad when you leave in the afternoon but you are immediately perked back up when you realize that you get to sleep, wake up and do it all over again... aaawwww....
Then there's the bad relationship...The Relation-shit. Relationshits are work at a job you fucking hate and can't wait to get fired or have the balls to quit, but you want to get fired so you can collect unemployment and if you quit, then it's your fault you have no job...and everyone pretty much wants/needs a job right? Right...so Relationshits are jobs where you are sending your resume out on your work email cause you just.don't.give.a.fuck.
...I would like to add I am DAMN proud of that analogy...between my sister and my mom and their dating woes, I have managed to work out this here analogy between relationships and relationshits and how you know which one you're in... DAMN proud of myself... and guess which one I have???
hehehe...
Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, Flash Sideways... In remembering our past places, places of and in our past, I thought about what it must have looked like on the outside... I thought about our "times" we were having and sometimes I thought, wow, we were having a hard time, or wow, we had a down period... well, here's the thing. We WERE...but it wasn't US. What was happening was happening to US as a unit, not between the two of us. Any true unhappiness I have been apart of since I've been coupled was caused by outside forces... we were always teamed up and ready to go. So we had bummed out periods, but us, WE were good, solid. We were better than okay. But still, not bright and shiney unicorns shitting rainbows kinds of times going on...and we got through it as a unit...then I think of those times and Thing 1...and she was growing and learning during those times...she was eating on her own, she was potty training, she was speaking, thinking, learning.
Now, we have another that is speaking, thinking, learning... Not REALLY speaking, it's that "twin talk" that only we understand...but we hear it. It's there.
I say Flash Sideways because we are remembering what was going on when Thing 1 did the things that Thing 2 does... oh yeah, the apartment, apartment 2 or apartment 1? Well, if Thing 1 was born, obviously 2...oh yeah, I hated that place, the downstairs neighbors, the light in our bedroom window at night while we were TRYING to sleep, the THIS and the THAT...and then I wonder, were we EVER happy there? And then psycho's house... were we EVER happy there? And the wife part, were you unhappy with ME there? So I bring up that Mister was unhappy when we were there...and he says yeah kinda..and we talk and realize...it wasn't with eachother we had these feelings and it was all about the place and the situation not being awesome and how we DID have to try EXTRA hard to enjoy ourselves because it's NOT fun to rent someone else's house or an apartment...
Buyer's remorse? Maybe... but it comes in flashes and spurts like PTSD. (or so I imagine of course, I wouldn't really know, but it's my closest analogy)
Buying the house always trumps NOT having bought the house... I think what's happening is that so much time has passed since apartment 1 and 2 that I can look back now with fonder memories, and that's why this is so new to me. So new to think "wow, we had a good time, why did we buy a house?" but it's all relative...it's time... time passes and we sometimes forget the negative...at least I have been known to do that a time or two. I don't always WANT to remember the bad, especially if I feel like it's not going to do me any good down the road. I definitely believe in guarding yourself. that's a given in life, it's necessary to remember certain things from the past so you don't repeat.
But these flashes seem more like flash sideways to me...because when I remember these things in these places lately, Thing 2 is doing things that Thing 1 did in these past places...and I see the wee one crawl into her booster seat to eat, and I get a flash of the big one doing the same thing at the same place in a different place where we were the same family that loved eacthother the same...just in a different place... See? Sideways... Right now, it doesn't feel like I have to go BACK to remember. It feels like I just have to step to the side...
Like the eye trick, you cover one eye to see one side, and you switch eyes and you see another side. Sometimes I feel like if I cover one eye, I see here and now...and if I switch, I see then and there...
See? Sideways...
...Locking Up Single Parent Summer...
I have been "off" for over a month... not gonna say sorry...just gonna say... I hate being right...
Or if you prefer another bumper sticker... I told you so, with a side of tongue sticking out and fingers in the ears...
But I digress...
Here we are, knee deep in third grade awesomeness, getting the hang of homework and awesomeness of third graders everywhere... Thing 2 wishes she was BIG... like Tom Hanks 'n shit... but alas... you are not... you are wee... you are in between 18months and 24 months in a land I like to call "They don't make clothes for you so you have to trip or be trapped". The holidays... JESUS... Already saying "The Holidays?" STFU Holidays!!!
I have NOT heard a Christmas song ANYWHERE yet...and I am enjoying that.
I actually LIKE Christmas songs...so I'm not even going to go there...
Single Parent Summer: over... done.. the book is read... closed, shelved until next year...
Gone is the paycheck that came with it and we are back on lock down.
Gone are the bustling HAWT days of frustration from sweat pouring down my burning red face, glasses falling off as I put The Things in the car for a ride to wherever, having to remember, "Let's leave before --- so we don't get stuck in the car in the heat, and lets go home AFTER dark..."
...and gone is the freedom of no homework...there is so much GROWN UP going on in the fall, winter and spring months... It'salmost overwhelming.... It's responsibility at it's finest...it's grown up. It's Mom and Dad and Kids...
...Gone are the quickie meals of Del Taco quesadillas and bean burritos and French fries.
...Gone is the excuse to get away with the aforementioned quickie meals...
And it couldn't come at a better time! It's been a particularly trying summer. There have been a lot of financial responsibilities to handle, much more than usual... the savings we saved from the tax return are GONE... the savings I have saved since the first of the year when I wrote my budget are pretty much gone too...I am saving less even cause I am RESPONSIBLE and went with the 401k...I might even just up the bitch so I can hold onto SOME of our money... BUT... I digress...
The financial setbacks we came across were due to the unexpected things that come with owning a home and having cars that are NOT new, but still, with the repairs and things needed on both, it's still less than HALF what we would have spent on car payments, insurance and registration on new vehicles... so we are still WINNING! I have a few bucks on top of last years goal...so we're good. Plus, I got to a point this year where I'm like, Fuck it. You can't take it with you. I have a savings. I was able to write checks and swipe the card when some people would be hocking furniture... so I'm not gonna complain. I'm go home and be happy...after my nervous breakdown.
Next summer, I can't wait. If The Things come along as they atleast SHOULD... it should be stellarly better than this summer... yeah, stellarly, don't look it up, it's MY word and it doesn't exist but in my head.
I am already eagerly anticipating cooking dinner for the four of us, putting daddy's in a lovely container for when he gets home from the game, rinse, repeat.
I was not able to do that this past summer. I had THAT kid...the one that takes a village to raise.. Yeah, that one. and I don't have a village... my village is too far... so we make do...so one summer, out of The Thing's lives, we cheated... and it was fun...
Next summer... no cheating... It more than likely will not be necessary and I am already looking forward to it. Meanwhile, hello FALL! I missed you! Take off your coat and stay awhile! No really, take off your damn coat cause it's effing hot outside still.
I must say it has definitely leveled off and I can't wait to put my floor fan away for the season! It's happening sooner than later. I still have a month or two before I will need to replace my furnace filter and I even had a lower SCE bill than I budgeted for according my last year's budget. Thanks for coming in under a lot of my budget, I was actually able to put a chunk of money away and still leave room for all the bills I have slated to pay with this check AND Thing 1's dental work.... SO MUCH dental work.. I feel so horrible.
My mouth is awful, my mister's mouth is AWFUL... so I had to know that our damn kids would have horribly yucky mouths... poor babes... all I can do is harp on them to brush their teeth and take them in for check ups when I'm supposed to... doesn't make it any less painful to watch... So this is basically a rant... a ramble... about how summer is over, fall is beginning with awesome weather we usually don't see until October is almost over and we scoped out a rad place that we might be able to go apple picking at before the season is over...this is very exciting to me.
We have been here 4 years, and we finally explored! I don't like to explore alone, and I don't' count Choni...so we don't' like to explore alone as it were... so we dragged Ma, my sis's and their entourages out to the middle of nowhere, a mile high...and BOOM... it was like a different state! Definitely not what people think when they think "California" but Ma's worldly beau said the sage brush was a dead giveaway... cause he's a smart dude like that and that's why we like him!
With more time at home and more time to do his extra curricular activities, I have noticed my Mister is a slightly happier Mister. I say slightly cause he was already happy and it's hard to improve on perfection :) Don't get me wrong he can be a pain in the ass sometimes...but it's one of those things where it doesn't bug me cause I would miss it in a heart beat if I didn't have it anymore...aawwww....
I think that wraps it up...
Or if you prefer another bumper sticker... I told you so, with a side of tongue sticking out and fingers in the ears...
But I digress...
Here we are, knee deep in third grade awesomeness, getting the hang of homework and awesomeness of third graders everywhere... Thing 2 wishes she was BIG... like Tom Hanks 'n shit... but alas... you are not... you are wee... you are in between 18months and 24 months in a land I like to call "They don't make clothes for you so you have to trip or be trapped". The holidays... JESUS... Already saying "The Holidays?" STFU Holidays!!!
I have NOT heard a Christmas song ANYWHERE yet...and I am enjoying that.
I actually LIKE Christmas songs...so I'm not even going to go there...
Single Parent Summer: over... done.. the book is read... closed, shelved until next year...
Gone is the paycheck that came with it and we are back on lock down.
Gone are the bustling HAWT days of frustration from sweat pouring down my burning red face, glasses falling off as I put The Things in the car for a ride to wherever, having to remember, "Let's leave before --- so we don't get stuck in the car in the heat, and lets go home AFTER dark..."
...and gone is the freedom of no homework...there is so much GROWN UP going on in the fall, winter and spring months... It's
...Gone are the quickie meals of Del Taco quesadillas and bean burritos and French fries.
...Gone is the excuse to get away with the aforementioned quickie meals...
And it couldn't come at a better time! It's been a particularly trying summer. There have been a lot of financial responsibilities to handle, much more than usual... the savings we saved from the tax return are GONE... the savings I have saved since the first of the year when I wrote my budget are pretty much gone too...I am saving less even cause I am RESPONSIBLE and went with the 401k...I might even just up the bitch so I can hold onto SOME of our money... BUT... I digress...
The financial setbacks we came across were due to the unexpected things that come with owning a home and having cars that are NOT new, but still, with the repairs and things needed on both, it's still less than HALF what we would have spent on car payments, insurance and registration on new vehicles... so we are still WINNING! I have a few bucks on top of last years goal...so we're good. Plus, I got to a point this year where I'm like, Fuck it. You can't take it with you. I have a savings. I was able to write checks and swipe the card when some people would be hocking furniture... so I'm not gonna complain. I'm go home and be happy...after my nervous breakdown.
Next summer, I can't wait. If The Things come along as they atleast SHOULD... it should be stellarly better than this summer... yeah, stellarly, don't look it up, it's MY word and it doesn't exist but in my head.
I am already eagerly anticipating cooking dinner for the four of us, putting daddy's in a lovely container for when he gets home from the game, rinse, repeat.
I was not able to do that this past summer. I had THAT kid...the one that takes a village to raise.. Yeah, that one. and I don't have a village... my village is too far... so we make do...so one summer, out of The Thing's lives, we cheated... and it was fun...
Next summer... no cheating... It more than likely will not be necessary and I am already looking forward to it. Meanwhile, hello FALL! I missed you! Take off your coat and stay awhile! No really, take off your damn coat cause it's effing hot outside still.
I must say it has definitely leveled off and I can't wait to put my floor fan away for the season! It's happening sooner than later. I still have a month or two before I will need to replace my furnace filter and I even had a lower SCE bill than I budgeted for according my last year's budget. Thanks for coming in under a lot of my budget, I was actually able to put a chunk of money away and still leave room for all the bills I have slated to pay with this check AND Thing 1's dental work.... SO MUCH dental work.. I feel so horrible.
My mouth is awful, my mister's mouth is AWFUL... so I had to know that our damn kids would have horribly yucky mouths... poor babes... all I can do is harp on them to brush their teeth and take them in for check ups when I'm supposed to... doesn't make it any less painful to watch... So this is basically a rant... a ramble... about how summer is over, fall is beginning with awesome weather we usually don't see until October is almost over and we scoped out a rad place that we might be able to go apple picking at before the season is over...this is very exciting to me.
We have been here 4 years, and we finally explored! I don't like to explore alone, and I don't' count Choni...so we don't' like to explore alone as it were... so we dragged Ma, my sis's and their entourages out to the middle of nowhere, a mile high...and BOOM... it was like a different state! Definitely not what people think when they think "California" but Ma's worldly beau said the sage brush was a dead giveaway... cause he's a smart dude like that and that's why we like him!
With more time at home and more time to do his extra curricular activities, I have noticed my Mister is a slightly happier Mister. I say slightly cause he was already happy and it's hard to improve on perfection :) Don't get me wrong he can be a pain in the ass sometimes...but it's one of those things where it doesn't bug me cause I would miss it in a heart beat if I didn't have it anymore...aawwww....
I think that wraps it up...
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
I FORGOT I LOVE TO READ!!!
Stupid right? Imagine MY surprise when I realized it...
I had been reading King's 11/22/63 off and on between crochet projects, paying bills online and taking care of household chores on my lunches at work. Very seldom did I find myself with a moment at home to do this... Am I shocked? No. I have the two kiddos and there was softball and there was this and there was that and there was just moments of sitting on the couch, all four of us slugging up a Saturday afternoon... I have the book... I can return to the book. I can't recreate moments like THAT one. I don't think ANYONE really can... SLURP... that's what I do, I SLURP them up and enjoy and savor because the book will always be there, in my drawer at work...and if work burns down... I can buy another book...
Thank you books, for being so sturdy and solid and always there when I'm ready to return to you...the penultimate loyalty! Even better than a dog, who'd a thought?
And thank you to my sister from another mister for always having just the right taste in book to get me...
I just finished "Joyland" by Stephen King. A pulp novel... one I never knew existed and it's fairly new. I was ok with the fact I hadn't heard of it, I didn't expect to know about it. I pulled myself out of "The Know" for a minute or two while I soak up all these firsts, to be returned to later. So I'm returning slowly, one foot in the door... part-timer over here.
I sucked that book up and all it's delicious description that King serves up so well, hitting all the satisfying parts of my literary appetite. Fantastico! Mangia!!
It was a great little book, perfect for cleansing your palate... It's the salad course to my new meal of book reading...
But what I am going to do is...re-read.
I have had so many things go on since I've read some of my favorites that I'm not able to answer questions about books as well as I used to... I need to get into the archives of my memory warehouse. Maybe the best way to unlock this hidden information is to revisit it... maybe that's the key... For instance, I KNOW I could have looked this up, but it really pissed me the fuck off that I couldn't answer Choni's questions about Holden Caulfield... GODDAMN IT!!! That is unacceptable for an English Major!!!!
So, here I go... my Journey "On The Road..." and beyond ..."The Rye"...
because I can, because I need to open up those periodicals in my brain...
If I can't access them, what good are they?
I had been reading King's 11/22/63 off and on between crochet projects, paying bills online and taking care of household chores on my lunches at work. Very seldom did I find myself with a moment at home to do this... Am I shocked? No. I have the two kiddos and there was softball and there was this and there was that and there was just moments of sitting on the couch, all four of us slugging up a Saturday afternoon... I have the book... I can return to the book. I can't recreate moments like THAT one. I don't think ANYONE really can... SLURP... that's what I do, I SLURP them up and enjoy and savor because the book will always be there, in my drawer at work...and if work burns down... I can buy another book...
Thank you books, for being so sturdy and solid and always there when I'm ready to return to you...the penultimate loyalty! Even better than a dog, who'd a thought?
And thank you to my sister from another mister for always having just the right taste in book to get me...
I just finished "Joyland" by Stephen King. A pulp novel... one I never knew existed and it's fairly new. I was ok with the fact I hadn't heard of it, I didn't expect to know about it. I pulled myself out of "The Know" for a minute or two while I soak up all these firsts, to be returned to later. So I'm returning slowly, one foot in the door... part-timer over here.
I sucked that book up and all it's delicious description that King serves up so well, hitting all the satisfying parts of my literary appetite. Fantastico! Mangia!!
It was a great little book, perfect for cleansing your palate... It's the salad course to my new meal of book reading...
But what I am going to do is...re-read.
I have had so many things go on since I've read some of my favorites that I'm not able to answer questions about books as well as I used to... I need to get into the archives of my memory warehouse. Maybe the best way to unlock this hidden information is to revisit it... maybe that's the key... For instance, I KNOW I could have looked this up, but it really pissed me the fuck off that I couldn't answer Choni's questions about Holden Caulfield... GODDAMN IT!!! That is unacceptable for an English Major!!!!
So, here I go... my Journey "On The Road..." and beyond ..."The Rye"...
because I can, because I need to open up those periodicals in my brain...
If I can't access them, what good are they?
...And So It Begins...
First Day of School: 2014
And now... I have an 8 year old 3rd grader... And a teeny one that wishes she could take part in the First Day of School hoopla.
I have known about the First Day of School since the day they posted the new calendar online.
I knew it was coming...
It was on the calendar, my planner, my phone, my work calendar, my work computer and the calendar in the kids room... SO... I knew... we ALL knew.. my frikkin coworkers knew...
Then WHY was it...Saturday afternoon... I realized that my child had all the same old socks (now dirty and small as well as just plain "old") and I should probably take care of that posthaste...
We BRAVED the Wal-Mart and it's mad rushes of humans with baskets on wheels toting around pencils, backpacks (or book bags if you so choose) lunch boxes, etc...et al...
I wanted to get ALL of those things but here's the thing about Thing 1's school. They hand out a list on the First Day of School and all you have to do is make sure you have those things. I was GROSSLY over prepared for her first day of school in Kindergarten and have yet to make the same mistake twice, I thank you...
Needless to say, we were able to stay away from the Supplies aisle and happily I might add.
Straight to clothing we went and I let her pick out her own socks. Imagine my chagrin when she picked out the most NEON and ostentatious pairs of socks... Fine, it's what the kids are wearing these days. And we couldn't get Thing 1 something without getting Thing 2 something...and since it IS summer, and it IS warm, and she IS walking more and wearing shoes more... she got thin ankle socks that, too, could be seen from space. Fine.. .great...
We got home, I threw the new socks in the washer with a load of laundry and something came over me that... Oh God... We're not going to be There anymore... we were already HERE... and we were unpacking and fixin to stay... we are in the land of the 8 year old 3rd graders... and ours is on her way to be the fully independent type. With her matchy matchy outfit she picked out herself and hair clips that she (almost) put in her own hair that she brushed all on her own that morning without my asking (but I went behind her and Brush-ninja'd her hair anyways just in case). Put her dishes from her breakfast in the sink and had poured her own chocolate milk... I never thought that I would look at a spot on my table where there "should" be dishes from a kid...and have there NOT be dishes because she takes them to the sink herself now and rinses them herself... That's weird to me now... The me NOW thinks it's out of the ordinary... the me in two weeks probably won't care.
The First Day was a Mommy Daddy Take You To School Day type of morning... and we both were there to pick her up from the after school program that her awesome school provides free of charge to those who apply...which am US :) They love her there, she loves it there, she didn't go last year because it didn't make sense with Daddy home and grandpa gone...so last year she had her time with Daddy and baby... now she is ready to jump back in to full time socializing and crafting and free-from-baby-trying-to-crawl-up-her-butt-all-the-time. She has Daddy to thank for that and all his brilliantness and thoughts of projects and things to do... he's going to be busy and getting balls rolling for himself.. Yay!
I asked her how the First Day went...
"Fine"
"Really? That's it?"
"yeah, Mom. It's Fine. I like my teacher, kids are nice, program was nice... it was.. Fine"
Wow... that's it huh?
"Homework?"
"Not for me, but YOU have some."
She takes THE manila folder out of her bag. The one I've come to know so well with pages upon pages of "I agree to do this and make this pledge and make this promise and my kid's gonna keep their hands to themselves and they're going to be the best citizen they can while they're on you're turf" and I signed and I initialed and I was done while Thing 2 napped (time out, nap, whatever).
Yesterday, I picked her up and there was nothing.. Just more FINE... Is it possible that we have already gotten to the point in the road where I am more excited about school starting than the kids?
She was enthusiastic, and glad that school started. But not EXCITED.. so I guess I was a little alone in my excitement... We get home and I go through the spiel from last spring of "Lunch box emptied out on the table, book bag in your room, homework on the table."
"I did my homework. My program teacher checked it. It's done."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Really?"
"Yeah!"
"And you know what's going to happen to you if you aren't telling me the truth right? You KNOW it will reflect badly on you and this new teacher you said you really like will have to tell you something that will make you feel bad that you aren't doing well in school because you didn't do your homework right? and then she'll call or email me or daddy and you'll be in BIG trouble."
"Yeah. I know...and then no more Kindle right?"
"Right."
"Yeah... I know. It's done."
"Ok, I'll trust you. Do you know I mean by that? Do you know what Trust means?"
"Yeah."
"Ok, well so you don't have anything else to say to me? You are DONE with your homework"
"Yeah."
...and I left it at that... so now I have a 3rd grader and I am going to trust her. I am going to trust her that she did her homework.
Tonight when I pick her up, I will ask the program director if she is in fact doing her work there and if she isn't, I don't know if I should let her skate and see what her teacher says or if I should get involved now and nip it in the bud? I don't know that she's not doing her work. I want to see how this unfolds. Is it too soon to trust her to do what she knows she needs to do for school? I mean, I have a hard enough time reminding her to brush her teeth and pick her clothes up off the floor. But that's home, and that's Mom talking...kids brains are magical dryers where word socks get stuck and lost and never found again... so I don't expect her to absorb such a notion...but she has never really LIED to me on PURPOSE... and she didn't do anything that was terribly exciting last night to make her feel a lie was needed to get out of doing homework... so I'm going to let it go... I might as well test it now. I mean, it's 3rd grade and school just started... how much damage can she do in the first few weeks of school? I'm going to trust her, I decided. And I screwed myself REALLY good last night. She put her backpack in her room last night just like she was supposed to, so I couldn't even sneak in there and check it at night because I would have woken up the baby for sure. We'll see what happens... but it's a trip man... I'm already TRUSTING... I know it's not life or death, but it's a first step and it's crazy... CRAZY!!
Not as crazy though as some of the parents that were there to drop off their kids too...
Spandex is NOT back...don't try to bring it back!!
And now... I have an 8 year old 3rd grader... And a teeny one that wishes she could take part in the First Day of School hoopla.
I have known about the First Day of School since the day they posted the new calendar online.
I knew it was coming...
It was on the calendar, my planner, my phone, my work calendar, my work computer and the calendar in the kids room... SO... I knew... we ALL knew.. my frikkin coworkers knew...
Then WHY was it...Saturday afternoon... I realized that my child had all the same old socks (now dirty and small as well as just plain "old") and I should probably take care of that posthaste...
We BRAVED the Wal-Mart and it's mad rushes of humans with baskets on wheels toting around pencils, backpacks (or book bags if you so choose) lunch boxes, etc...et al...
I wanted to get ALL of those things but here's the thing about Thing 1's school. They hand out a list on the First Day of School and all you have to do is make sure you have those things. I was GROSSLY over prepared for her first day of school in Kindergarten and have yet to make the same mistake twice, I thank you...
Needless to say, we were able to stay away from the Supplies aisle and happily I might add.
Straight to clothing we went and I let her pick out her own socks. Imagine my chagrin when she picked out the most NEON and ostentatious pairs of socks... Fine, it's what the kids are wearing these days. And we couldn't get Thing 1 something without getting Thing 2 something...and since it IS summer, and it IS warm, and she IS walking more and wearing shoes more... she got thin ankle socks that, too, could be seen from space. Fine.. .great...
We got home, I threw the new socks in the washer with a load of laundry and something came over me that... Oh God... We're not going to be There anymore... we were already HERE... and we were unpacking and fixin to stay... we are in the land of the 8 year old 3rd graders... and ours is on her way to be the fully independent type. With her matchy matchy outfit she picked out herself and hair clips that she (almost) put in her own hair that she brushed all on her own that morning without my asking (but I went behind her and Brush-ninja'd her hair anyways just in case). Put her dishes from her breakfast in the sink and had poured her own chocolate milk... I never thought that I would look at a spot on my table where there "should" be dishes from a kid...and have there NOT be dishes because she takes them to the sink herself now and rinses them herself... That's weird to me now... The me NOW thinks it's out of the ordinary... the me in two weeks probably won't care.
The First Day was a Mommy Daddy Take You To School Day type of morning... and we both were there to pick her up from the after school program that her awesome school provides free of charge to those who apply...which am US :) They love her there, she loves it there, she didn't go last year because it didn't make sense with Daddy home and grandpa gone...so last year she had her time with Daddy and baby... now she is ready to jump back in to full time socializing and crafting and free-from-baby-trying-to-crawl-up-her-butt-all-the-time. She has Daddy to thank for that and all his brilliantness and thoughts of projects and things to do... he's going to be busy and getting balls rolling for himself.. Yay!
I asked her how the First Day went...
"Fine"
"Really? That's it?"
"yeah, Mom. It's Fine. I like my teacher, kids are nice, program was nice... it was.. Fine"
Wow... that's it huh?
"Homework?"
"Not for me, but YOU have some."
She takes THE manila folder out of her bag. The one I've come to know so well with pages upon pages of "I agree to do this and make this pledge and make this promise and my kid's gonna keep their hands to themselves and they're going to be the best citizen they can while they're on you're turf" and I signed and I initialed and I was done while Thing 2 napped (time out, nap, whatever).
Yesterday, I picked her up and there was nothing.. Just more FINE... Is it possible that we have already gotten to the point in the road where I am more excited about school starting than the kids?
She was enthusiastic, and glad that school started. But not EXCITED.. so I guess I was a little alone in my excitement... We get home and I go through the spiel from last spring of "Lunch box emptied out on the table, book bag in your room, homework on the table."
"I did my homework. My program teacher checked it. It's done."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Really?"
"Yeah!"
"And you know what's going to happen to you if you aren't telling me the truth right? You KNOW it will reflect badly on you and this new teacher you said you really like will have to tell you something that will make you feel bad that you aren't doing well in school because you didn't do your homework right? and then she'll call or email me or daddy and you'll be in BIG trouble."
"Yeah. I know...and then no more Kindle right?"
"Right."
"Yeah... I know. It's done."
"Ok, I'll trust you. Do you know I mean by that? Do you know what Trust means?"
"Yeah."
"Ok, well so you don't have anything else to say to me? You are DONE with your homework"
"Yeah."
...and I left it at that... so now I have a 3rd grader and I am going to trust her. I am going to trust her that she did her homework.
Tonight when I pick her up, I will ask the program director if she is in fact doing her work there and if she isn't, I don't know if I should let her skate and see what her teacher says or if I should get involved now and nip it in the bud? I don't know that she's not doing her work. I want to see how this unfolds. Is it too soon to trust her to do what she knows she needs to do for school? I mean, I have a hard enough time reminding her to brush her teeth and pick her clothes up off the floor. But that's home, and that's Mom talking...kids brains are magical dryers where word socks get stuck and lost and never found again... so I don't expect her to absorb such a notion...but she has never really LIED to me on PURPOSE... and she didn't do anything that was terribly exciting last night to make her feel a lie was needed to get out of doing homework... so I'm going to let it go... I might as well test it now. I mean, it's 3rd grade and school just started... how much damage can she do in the first few weeks of school? I'm going to trust her, I decided. And I screwed myself REALLY good last night. She put her backpack in her room last night just like she was supposed to, so I couldn't even sneak in there and check it at night because I would have woken up the baby for sure. We'll see what happens... but it's a trip man... I'm already TRUSTING... I know it's not life or death, but it's a first step and it's crazy... CRAZY!!
Not as crazy though as some of the parents that were there to drop off their kids too...
Spandex is NOT back...don't try to bring it back!!
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
DREAM CAST: Buckaroo Banzai ...
If you read that going , "Whaaaa??!?!"
Step into my office and let me introduce to a world that my pop walked me into without knowing it...
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension is a great flick.
It's got everything!!! Action, drama, love, science, fantasy, CHEESE!! LOTS of cheese... especially the red framed glasses that the studio didn't want Peter Weller to sport in the THREE whole scenes he has them on... fantastic!
We had this on during dinner a few nights ago and it came up that this movie was WAY ahead of it's time and we were almost GLAD that it didn't catch on when it did, so it could be a nice little cult classic for us to geek out over and not everyone knows the "secret handshake" about this great little flick.
BUT, the other edge of the sword is that it's great... it really is! And I would like to spread the greatness to share with everyone! And I want to say to someone I barely know, "Didn't you just LOVE the bubblewrap glasses? And the Rasta Alien good guys?" and they can say "YES!!" instead a mouth agape look of shock and confusion... that would be nice too...
In conversing about how we sort of wish they would remake this, and not screw it up, we started to say, "In a perfect world..." and all that... so then ... Dream Casting Buckaroo Banzai jumped off the session...
Buckaroo Banzai: Brandon Routh
Dr. Lizardo: John Turturro
Perfect Tommy: Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Rawhide: Jacob Pitts
Penny Priddy: Brie Larson
New Jersey: Justin Long
John Bigboote: Jemaine Clement
the rest of them can pretty much be figured out during general casting, but these were our musts and thought they would really make the remake if ever anyone decided to tackle such a thing :)
Step into my office and let me introduce to a world that my pop walked me into without knowing it...
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension is a great flick.
It's got everything!!! Action, drama, love, science, fantasy, CHEESE!! LOTS of cheese... especially the red framed glasses that the studio didn't want Peter Weller to sport in the THREE whole scenes he has them on... fantastic!
We had this on during dinner a few nights ago and it came up that this movie was WAY ahead of it's time and we were almost GLAD that it didn't catch on when it did, so it could be a nice little cult classic for us to geek out over and not everyone knows the "secret handshake" about this great little flick.
BUT, the other edge of the sword is that it's great... it really is! And I would like to spread the greatness to share with everyone! And I want to say to someone I barely know, "Didn't you just LOVE the bubblewrap glasses? And the Rasta Alien good guys?" and they can say "YES!!" instead a mouth agape look of shock and confusion... that would be nice too...
In conversing about how we sort of wish they would remake this, and not screw it up, we started to say, "In a perfect world..." and all that... so then ... Dream Casting Buckaroo Banzai jumped off the session...
Buckaroo Banzai: Brandon Routh
Dr. Lizardo: John Turturro
Perfect Tommy: Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Rawhide: Jacob Pitts
Penny Priddy: Brie Larson
New Jersey: Justin Long
John Bigboote: Jemaine Clement
the rest of them can pretty much be figured out during general casting, but these were our musts and thought they would really make the remake if ever anyone decided to tackle such a thing :)
DREAM CAST: Live Action TaleSpin
If you were a kid in the early 90's, I don't care WHO you were, you watched TaleSpin...
For me it was KCAL 9 everyday after school until the 'rents came home and then it was Wheel of Fortune and dinner and primetime...
I filled my afternoons with the toons of Disney on in the background while I did homework (yes, I know I actually DID my homework)...
The best part of TaleSpin was it was about a 30's era and planes... I was in... even my dad tried to catch it to watch with me on his few and far between days off. Reason 472 why my pop would have loved to live in our time... DVR...
Anyways, carrying on to the Dream Cast bit... Choners LOVES the underdog cartoon as much as I do and now we are turning the kids on to it... so of course THIS conversation had to happen...
Choni: Who would you get to be Baloo if you they did a Live Action TaleSpin?
Me: Oh damn... let's do it! Who WOULD we get? **gets pen and paper and writes down the dreamcasting session.
--This is what we came up with...
Baloo: Kevin James
Rebecca: Gretchen Mol
Wild Cat: Steve Zahn
Don Karnage: Kevin Kline
Shere Khan: Arnold Vosloo
Louie: Jack Johnson (you know you want to see this guy act)
and Don Karnage's First Mate: Steve Buscemi.
And there you have it... try getting THAT out of your head ;)
For me it was KCAL 9 everyday after school until the 'rents came home and then it was Wheel of Fortune and dinner and primetime...
I filled my afternoons with the toons of Disney on in the background while I did homework (yes, I know I actually DID my homework)...
The best part of TaleSpin was it was about a 30's era and planes... I was in... even my dad tried to catch it to watch with me on his few and far between days off. Reason 472 why my pop would have loved to live in our time... DVR...
Anyways, carrying on to the Dream Cast bit... Choners LOVES the underdog cartoon as much as I do and now we are turning the kids on to it... so of course THIS conversation had to happen...
Choni: Who would you get to be Baloo if you they did a Live Action TaleSpin?
Me: Oh damn... let's do it! Who WOULD we get? **gets pen and paper and writes down the dreamcasting session.
--This is what we came up with...
Baloo: Kevin James
Rebecca: Gretchen Mol
Wild Cat: Steve Zahn
Don Karnage: Kevin Kline
Shere Khan: Arnold Vosloo
Louie: Jack Johnson (you know you want to see this guy act)
and Don Karnage's First Mate: Steve Buscemi.
And there you have it... try getting THAT out of your head ;)
Monday, July 29, 2013
Ashes to Ashes, We All Fall Down...From Lack Of Sleep....
I felt inspired by a post I just read and I got all kinds of bursting thought bubbles above my highlighted head... I just HAD to do it...
A History In The Sleep Life of Us, Posthumously.
...because when I first read "What about you guys?" and such and was thinking, "I want to click 'comments' but why would I? We're so boring..." and then I thought,"Well, the kids DON'T sleep the same routine they did 6 months ago..." and there the was the six months before that and the six months before THAT and the months before that and then there was just Thing 1 and WOW!
It's actually changed quite a bit, now hasn't it? Maybe it's not all that boring! Harley's early days were difficult looking back. It was definitely normal seeming to us at the time due to the fact we had NOT been parents before, so anything we deemed normal was just what was happening at the time. 8 years ago, Daddy's job was at night. He'd come home and have Harley duty. She hated the bassinet that she had. And I hated that she hated it. It was beautifully constructed, couldn't she see that and understand that with her barely 3 day old brain?? What was wrong with her?!?! Later we found that it was NOT the bassinet but WAS in fact the A/C vent pointed DIRECTLY into the canopy creating a FUCKING WIND TUNNEL! Of course she hated it!! As a direct result, I believe, she then hated any air/wind on her face for years afterward.
From the wee early days she slept with daddy on his chest (protected from the a/c vent debacle that eluded us) and he stayed up with her and fed and changed and cooed and hugged. He slept while I took the day shift. I went back to work at the fairly typical six week stage. We put her in her crib because she hated the bassinet so much and two days before I was due back at the office, I knew we had to do something. Dammit all if that kid didn't sleep 8 hours that night! And slept through the night thereafter. She just wanted the crib, we thought... No, she just didn't want to sleep in a damned tornado. She was amazing. She went down at 9pm and woke at 6am. Sometimes 5am. When it was a 5am kind of day, Gpa was usually right there to get her and shooing me away...who was I to argue? I mean, it's his house right? He can get up and get the baby if he wants!! Until she was 18 months, it was sleep all night from 9-6.We moved twice and when she got to the second new place, she was uncertain about it. Her new surroundings made her uneasy when it came to night time.
She started sleepwalking and we had to put one of those handle things on the inside of her door so she wouldn't do any harm to herself. Then she was wanting to sleep with us. There was some coaxing for six months. Then at two years, she started a really cute routine... or WE started it and she ran with it. From the time she was two to when we moved again 6 months later, we would turn the lights off in the living room...turn the sound down on the TV... and we would sit with her on our couch and get cozy...then at 9 we would say "Ni-night Harley" and she would jump off the couch, give daddy a kiss and drag her binkie to bed, waving at us...she would shut her door to just a crack (we would shut it the rest of the way later) and that was it...she was sleeping. There a handful of nights this didn't work, but it worked most of the time....
Then we moved again...she didn't like that place either...what worked in the new place was letting her fall asleep on the couch THEN moving her. She stuck to her bedtime doing this, amazingly...but sometimes, just sometimes she would wake up and hang on her door and call for daddy to come get her...sometimes he did and brought her to bed with us and it was fingers and elbows in our eyes...but sometimes he would take her to the living room and hang a few minutes where she would fall back asleep and she would get carried back to bed.
When she was 4, we bought our house...and she hasn't had any problems since...a few nightmares, but nothing to write home about...
The wee one, she was different from the get go... she wanted to nurse every hour on the hour so the first two nights were HELLISH... lack of sleep inspired a talk between me and daddy whether we were wanting to give nursing the big GO or use the formula and bottles we had for backup... after no sleep in basically three days, I was ready to not go down the road of the sleepless unhappy mommy... I put the bassinet in our room and I slept on our bed the first time in 3 nights... I had premade water in bottles, premeasure formula in a container...all I had to do was dump, shake and serve. I used one hand to feed while the other hand changed the diaper that she wet after every serving which was every two hours for the first 5 weeks...then she wanted more and longer time between feedings... I woke up with her for the six weeks and daddy would take the morning shift giving me a few hours of sleep in a row. Aaaww, that daddy...
When I went back to work , Thing 2 was NOT on the same track as big sis... she was still every 3 hours at night.. sometimes...just sometimes.. a little longer...
Sometimes, she wanted to be held and not let down... and it was winter-ish time and we bundled her and swaddled her and she hated to be swaddled but she liked to be snuggled, if that makes sense... she doesn't like to be swaddled... but she likes snuggly blankies and soft comfy cushions... so we made a little snuggle cave in her bassinet and used the boppy and I'm sure there are people out there that would LOVE to hang us by our toes if they saw what we did...but then again, isn't it just super CRUNCHY of us to do what THE BABY WANTED? she slept all night like that and when she out grew that snuggly cave and the bassinet and went into the crib, we went back to waking up at some time of the night.
somewhere around 8 months she stopped the midnight wake up. She did, though, wake up earlier thought. She went down at 9 and woke up at 5:30am... we almost had her to six :) so it was close and then sometime around 10 months, we were on the schedule we are on now. What we didn't know though, was that she doesn't like to be in the pack n' play. At ALL... so going somewhere doesn't bode well with her. Also, this poor kid has been teething every day since she was 6 months old which has caused plenty of sleeplessness for me n daddy... and frustration and confirmation as to why we CLOSED AND LOCKED the baby factory. We are done, and we are enjoying this!! She has nights where all of a sudden we hear a SHRIEK!!!! Then nothing...and we fall asleep again and it's peaceful. Thing 1 napped where she fell and Thing 2 naps twice a day for two hours each and that's what makes her tick. I learned this weekend that if I go somewhere that's not my mom's or my MIL's, then I bring the pack and play.
Granted, the naps are forced, but she NEEDS them OH SO badly... she usually cries a bit and falls asleep after 20 minutes... once in awhile what she really needs is a time out, chill out time... but the naps are KEY.
It's amazing how I went from, "Ugh, why would I of all people say anything?"
to all of that up there ^^
It's amazing what the brain's first reaction is to remember something one way, and then when you think about it and think really hard... all sorts of thinks get thought! And thinking of all those thinks, I remember that little boppy cave that daddy made and that baby loved so much... it was a Godsend... the man and his brain and how it works those things out so wonderfully... That man was meant to be a daddy... he really was! As much as I almost get to the point where I miss a good excuse to watch The Simpsons Movie at 4am... sleep is good too... sleep and coffee... lots and lots of coffee...
A History In The Sleep Life of Us, Posthumously.
...because when I first read "What about you guys?" and such and was thinking, "I want to click 'comments' but why would I? We're so boring..." and then I thought,"Well, the kids DON'T sleep the same routine they did 6 months ago..." and there the was the six months before that and the six months before THAT and the months before that and then there was just Thing 1 and WOW!
It's actually changed quite a bit, now hasn't it? Maybe it's not all that boring! Harley's early days were difficult looking back. It was definitely normal seeming to us at the time due to the fact we had NOT been parents before, so anything we deemed normal was just what was happening at the time. 8 years ago, Daddy's job was at night. He'd come home and have Harley duty. She hated the bassinet that she had. And I hated that she hated it. It was beautifully constructed, couldn't she see that and understand that with her barely 3 day old brain?? What was wrong with her?!?! Later we found that it was NOT the bassinet but WAS in fact the A/C vent pointed DIRECTLY into the canopy creating a FUCKING WIND TUNNEL! Of course she hated it!! As a direct result, I believe, she then hated any air/wind on her face for years afterward.
From the wee early days she slept with daddy on his chest (protected from the a/c vent debacle that eluded us) and he stayed up with her and fed and changed and cooed and hugged. He slept while I took the day shift. I went back to work at the fairly typical six week stage. We put her in her crib because she hated the bassinet so much and two days before I was due back at the office, I knew we had to do something. Dammit all if that kid didn't sleep 8 hours that night! And slept through the night thereafter. She just wanted the crib, we thought... No, she just didn't want to sleep in a damned tornado. She was amazing. She went down at 9pm and woke at 6am. Sometimes 5am. When it was a 5am kind of day, Gpa was usually right there to get her and shooing me away...who was I to argue? I mean, it's his house right? He can get up and get the baby if he wants!! Until she was 18 months, it was sleep all night from 9-6.We moved twice and when she got to the second new place, she was uncertain about it. Her new surroundings made her uneasy when it came to night time.
She started sleepwalking and we had to put one of those handle things on the inside of her door so she wouldn't do any harm to herself. Then she was wanting to sleep with us. There was some coaxing for six months. Then at two years, she started a really cute routine... or WE started it and she ran with it. From the time she was two to when we moved again 6 months later, we would turn the lights off in the living room...turn the sound down on the TV... and we would sit with her on our couch and get cozy...then at 9 we would say "Ni-night Harley" and she would jump off the couch, give daddy a kiss and drag her binkie to bed, waving at us...she would shut her door to just a crack (we would shut it the rest of the way later) and that was it...she was sleeping. There a handful of nights this didn't work, but it worked most of the time....
Then we moved again...she didn't like that place either...what worked in the new place was letting her fall asleep on the couch THEN moving her. She stuck to her bedtime doing this, amazingly...but sometimes, just sometimes she would wake up and hang on her door and call for daddy to come get her...sometimes he did and brought her to bed with us and it was fingers and elbows in our eyes...but sometimes he would take her to the living room and hang a few minutes where she would fall back asleep and she would get carried back to bed.
When she was 4, we bought our house...and she hasn't had any problems since...a few nightmares, but nothing to write home about...
The wee one, she was different from the get go... she wanted to nurse every hour on the hour so the first two nights were HELLISH... lack of sleep inspired a talk between me and daddy whether we were wanting to give nursing the big GO or use the formula and bottles we had for backup... after no sleep in basically three days, I was ready to not go down the road of the sleepless unhappy mommy... I put the bassinet in our room and I slept on our bed the first time in 3 nights... I had premade water in bottles, premeasure formula in a container...all I had to do was dump, shake and serve. I used one hand to feed while the other hand changed the diaper that she wet after every serving which was every two hours for the first 5 weeks...then she wanted more and longer time between feedings... I woke up with her for the six weeks and daddy would take the morning shift giving me a few hours of sleep in a row. Aaaww, that daddy...
When I went back to work , Thing 2 was NOT on the same track as big sis... she was still every 3 hours at night.. sometimes...just sometimes.. a little longer...
Sometimes, she wanted to be held and not let down... and it was winter-ish time and we bundled her and swaddled her and she hated to be swaddled but she liked to be snuggled, if that makes sense... she doesn't like to be swaddled... but she likes snuggly blankies and soft comfy cushions... so we made a little snuggle cave in her bassinet and used the boppy and I'm sure there are people out there that would LOVE to hang us by our toes if they saw what we did...but then again, isn't it just super CRUNCHY of us to do what THE BABY WANTED? she slept all night like that and when she out grew that snuggly cave and the bassinet and went into the crib, we went back to waking up at some time of the night.
somewhere around 8 months she stopped the midnight wake up. She did, though, wake up earlier thought. She went down at 9 and woke up at 5:30am... we almost had her to six :) so it was close and then sometime around 10 months, we were on the schedule we are on now. What we didn't know though, was that she doesn't like to be in the pack n' play. At ALL... so going somewhere doesn't bode well with her. Also, this poor kid has been teething every day since she was 6 months old which has caused plenty of sleeplessness for me n daddy... and frustration and confirmation as to why we CLOSED AND LOCKED the baby factory. We are done, and we are enjoying this!! She has nights where all of a sudden we hear a SHRIEK!!!! Then nothing...and we fall asleep again and it's peaceful. Thing 1 napped where she fell and Thing 2 naps twice a day for two hours each and that's what makes her tick. I learned this weekend that if I go somewhere that's not my mom's or my MIL's, then I bring the pack and play.
Granted, the naps are forced, but she NEEDS them OH SO badly... she usually cries a bit and falls asleep after 20 minutes... once in awhile what she really needs is a time out, chill out time... but the naps are KEY.
It's amazing how I went from, "Ugh, why would I of all people say anything?"
to all of that up there ^^
It's amazing what the brain's first reaction is to remember something one way, and then when you think about it and think really hard... all sorts of thinks get thought! And thinking of all those thinks, I remember that little boppy cave that daddy made and that baby loved so much... it was a Godsend... the man and his brain and how it works those things out so wonderfully... That man was meant to be a daddy... he really was! As much as I almost get to the point where I miss a good excuse to watch The Simpsons Movie at 4am... sleep is good too... sleep and coffee... lots and lots of coffee...
"Dirty Mouth? Clean it UP!"...
...Oh Orbit Lady.... PLEASE come through my house!!! ...And then I wake up... Cause yeah... that's NOT gonna happen. Not no way, not no how...
Guess what I did yesterday? Nothing. I cleaned the kids room with them (by with them of course I mean giving Thing 2 things to keep her busy while I cleaned with Thing 1)... I can't believe what we were able to clean. I can't believe what she let me get rid of. Yes LET ME. I know, I shouldn't let my kid have the say really. But here's the part about them being far apart. Thing 1 is at the age when she should be getting rid of baby toys...but we have the baby now...and she is old enough to play with all those toys. One day, they will be gone, but we just signed a new lease on their life. If those toys could talk I'd demand some thank yous... just sayin...
Cleaning the kid's room has become somewhat of a "mommy" job. Sometimes I sell myself on the idea that the chores are perfectly, evenly split up, but they're not. They're just not. It's never going to be perfectly even and perfect. Putting the kid's laundry away is a mommy job. But I like it. I like it because I am the one that buys them their replacement clothes...so if I buy the clothes, I should fold them and put them away so I know what's hole-y. What's shredded, ripped, stained, too small and ready to go. I like my "mommy" jobs. I try to do other things, but the only time I have to do things is the weekends, which this weekend was one where daddy worked... I played with the kiddos yesterday and cleaned and played...we watched movies, had a little friend over, sent the little friend home, and played... Mary slept, I worked on a crochet project (what's with all these breeders lately? I loved it!) and I went to bed a little later than usual cause I wanted to hug and kiss my Choni-baloney before I went to bed. And then, he did the dishes... He worked, came home at 9:30 after stopping at the store after work, put the food away and did the dishes... Yeah, that's what I married... and that's why I strive to be a better person everyday...and that's why last night I went to bed totally depressed. I am going to have start a personal journal....
I need somewhere where I can completely release the crazy inadequacies I feel as the spouse... some of it's pure bullshit. Some of it is pretty valid... Some of it is just for us.. some of it... like when I have had people tell me that from their end, they don't think Choni does enough...
Yep... people have told me that. I know what they mean is based on what they see, but you have to be in our house day to day to realize that it's really the other way around... I play with the kids when I have them... because I am constantly in a state of flux. I want to clean the house, I want to see them see me clean the house so they can say "wow, what a clean house we have." But I have some negative semi-repressed memories about having a clean house, which is also probably a serious part of me being "Clean or play? PLAY!" Because we did things as a family, but I can't remember a time my mom really PLAYED with me. I don't hold it against her or anything, she worked like a fuckin DOG to keep our house up and my dad did, too... food on the table and a clean house and a few memories here and there of Disneyland, Knott's, picnics, birthday parties. Lots of snuggly nights at home... right before bed and after dinner... very warm and snuggly... but I also remember several times when my OCD dad decided to WASH THE SCREENS instead of go to the park with us, so we made our own fun.
I know people will call bullshit on the fact that I say "well the baby is UP MY ASS" because it IS difficult to keep your mind ON TASK when a midget is pulling your pants down whilst climbing your leg... so we do what we can, but still... I feel like I should be doing a better job. Like my house should be immaculate like so many other people's houses are (or maybe they're not and I PRESUME they are)... I guess everyone juggles differently and this is how we juggle... We prioritized, and cleanliness of house has taken a bit of a back burner...sure, I Swiffer... that shit's RAD... but when I dusted my house as a chore when I was a kid, it was a rag and Pledge to the WHOLE shebang and that was all that was acceptable. My mom could tell when I tickled the house with a feather duster and what did I do the next day? Re-DID all the dusting I didn't do the day before....
I guess the point is, I don't have a clean house... my poor hubby does 95% percent more housework than I do and I play with the kids... and one day this will change... so I'm going to do my best to enjoy this while it lasts...because one day...the kids won't want a thing to do with me and I'll be cleaning out of necessity to keep my time occupied. And that's why my house is disheveled and my nails are barely kempt and I sneak in project-ing when the baby naps...oh and I am at my pre baby weight and sustaining because it's too goddamned hot to go outside and walk and my post work work-outs are on hold until Thing 2 gets old enough to NOT get into shit... I'm waiting for Fall basically... or OUR Fall, which starts in late November... I should call this time "Baby Flux"...maybe naming it will help me get out of my head about it... but see, now that I've said that and put it out there, I feel better already! Blah...word vomit...and now I am purged!!! ...and this is what happens when I have too much time to think things... because this is all bullshit...and I know that... first world problems eh? TOTALLY!!! And this is why I would be a horrible psych patient... I would do a round of word vomit...and I would be cured...teeheehee... And one day, I will be looking at a 5 year old Thing 2 and be thinking, "Remember when I didn't have time for things?"... I remember doing that with Thing 1. I think she was about 3 when I could just 100% get going on things and she wouldn't be ALL OVER ME...and as much as I sat there enjoying it, I was sad that I wasn't being called for, needed, "bugged"... It's bittersweet, that moment when you're doing something that you couldn't easily do with a small one around, and then the moment you can... it's ALMOST not as enjoyable it once was. Because that free time comes at a price...the price of kids growing up... Circle of life n shit... kids grow up, we get our "free time" back for what it's worth and we wonder where it all went... And it's all so incredibly NORMAL... and now I can move on to the next thing on my list of things to dwell on...what's for dinner??
Thursday, July 11, 2013
♪♪Nobody Does It Better...♪♪
Oh yes... they fucking do...
Do you want me to give my parenting insight??
Well I can't...
Because this chick is so awesome, she pretty much hits the nail on the head for me ALL the time.
And I LOVE it...but then I'm completely uninspired...because in a weird way I have tricked my stupid brain into thinking I did something...when I didn't...
This is why I have seemed "Silent Blog, Holy Blog" for so long... because I have read so many things on other blogs that were like "Exactly! Exactly. Exactly?" That I started to feel like...what's the point of ME going back and reiterating on it then?
My brain...oh brain you silly think popping your synaptic jazz... YOU SUCK...
I have a mental check list.
I have a physical check list, too. I am actually copying OUT of that little blue physical check list right now...
The latter gets less and less love because of my own personal bullshit mix of 1 part hands that hurt and 1 part my job is totally 100% demanding of my time now.
...my thinks do get written...they get THOUGHT...and when they get THOUGHT, they get mentally catalogued to hopefully be revisited later...but then I read something that my brain thinks "Wow, Exactly!" and that think does two different things...
1. List check marked mentally as if I myself wrote a meaningful post that means a lot to someone.
2. Completely disillusioned and suddenly uninspired because I wanted to say that... that very thing...and I couldn't/didn't say it first... so is life...
I don't like plagiarism. I don't like anything similar to it. but I'm telling you... I would footnote the shit out of this blog right here... It's all the badassness of being a parent and being able to just say, "Fuck it, kids are the way they are, they don't fit in boxes, they don't subject themselves to labels and sometimes you just need to hold them while you poop."
I'm totally sub-paraphrasing by the way...but I'm sure you knew that... I loved this piece so MUCH...
It's all the Thinks I think of parenting in one place.
Everyone is different, all kids are different. I realize that my "problems" are MINE... and granted they are completely welcomed warmly by people that have it WORSE than me...and scoffed at by people have it EASIER... but they're what I deal with on a day to day basis and that's what makes my kids MY kids and MY kid problems MINE.
With two kids that are walking different ends of the kid spectrum and working my patience like so much modeling clay, I love it. I love when something like this speaks to me so loudly that I feel completely at ONE with my life... As if someone floated up to me and said, "Oh yeah? Me, too, dude. Me...TOO."
And sometimes, you need a hand on your shoulder. I haven't always needed one.
My dad used to tell me I didn't require a proverbial (or even literal) pat on the back/shoulder area to keep me going...and that it was a great preservation tool. But to remember that if someone were to come up and give that to me, to completely accepted whether I felt it was warranted or not. So I believe the former and leave myself open for the latter...it creates a great balance to my particular brand of crazy (which my VERY good friend laughs at daily because she REALLY is crazy ;) and she knows that)...
So here's to the people that take the thoughts from my mouth, head and my heart and express them perfectly... because sometimes, I don't even know what I want to say...and then I read it...and I feel completely awesome afterwards! And WHO doesn't want to share the feeling of AWESOME?? WHO DAMMIT?!?!
Catch Up number two...as in poop...
Do you want me to give my parenting insight??
Well I can't...
Because this chick is so awesome, she pretty much hits the nail on the head for me ALL the time.
And I LOVE it...but then I'm completely uninspired...because in a weird way I have tricked my stupid brain into thinking I did something...when I didn't...
This is why I have seemed "Silent Blog, Holy Blog" for so long... because I have read so many things on other blogs that were like "Exactly! Exactly. Exactly?" That I started to feel like...what's the point of ME going back and reiterating on it then?
My brain...oh brain you silly think popping your synaptic jazz... YOU SUCK...
I have a mental check list.
I have a physical check list, too. I am actually copying OUT of that little blue physical check list right now...
The latter gets less and less love because of my own personal bullshit mix of 1 part hands that hurt and 1 part my job is totally 100% demanding of my time now.
...my thinks do get written...they get THOUGHT...and when they get THOUGHT, they get mentally catalogued to hopefully be revisited later...but then I read something that my brain thinks "Wow, Exactly!" and that think does two different things...
1. List check marked mentally as if I myself wrote a meaningful post that means a lot to someone.
2. Completely disillusioned and suddenly uninspired because I wanted to say that... that very thing...and I couldn't/didn't say it first... so is life...
I don't like plagiarism. I don't like anything similar to it. but I'm telling you... I would footnote the shit out of this blog right here... It's all the badassness of being a parent and being able to just say, "Fuck it, kids are the way they are, they don't fit in boxes, they don't subject themselves to labels and sometimes you just need to hold them while you poop."
I'm totally sub-paraphrasing by the way...but I'm sure you knew that... I loved this piece so MUCH...
It's all the Thinks I think of parenting in one place.
Everyone is different, all kids are different. I realize that my "problems" are MINE... and granted they are completely welcomed warmly by people that have it WORSE than me...and scoffed at by people have it EASIER... but they're what I deal with on a day to day basis and that's what makes my kids MY kids and MY kid problems MINE.
With two kids that are walking different ends of the kid spectrum and working my patience like so much modeling clay, I love it. I love when something like this speaks to me so loudly that I feel completely at ONE with my life... As if someone floated up to me and said, "Oh yeah? Me, too, dude. Me...TOO."
And sometimes, you need a hand on your shoulder. I haven't always needed one.
My dad used to tell me I didn't require a proverbial (or even literal) pat on the back/shoulder area to keep me going...and that it was a great preservation tool. But to remember that if someone were to come up and give that to me, to completely accepted whether I felt it was warranted or not. So I believe the former and leave myself open for the latter...it creates a great balance to my particular brand of crazy (which my VERY good friend laughs at daily because she REALLY is crazy ;) and she knows that)...
So here's to the people that take the thoughts from my mouth, head and my heart and express them perfectly... because sometimes, I don't even know what I want to say...and then I read it...and I feel completely awesome afterwards! And WHO doesn't want to share the feeling of AWESOME?? WHO DAMMIT?!?!
Catch Up number two...as in poop...
Hi Blog! It's Me, Margaret!
I can't believe I did it to myself... I really can't...
I didn't know I was doing it, but I was... It's been almost a year since I stopped physically journaling. I thought for sure when that happened that a psych consult would surely follow.
What I am realizing is that my world did not in fact come crashing down around me.
So, I take that as a very positive sign! A sign of the strong foundation that myself and others have built to preserve...I am still standing without what I thought for sure was keeping me sane by allowing me to clearly and concisely catalogue my thoughts. I stopped because, well, you know when something you love becomes work? My journaling became work. I started having to make games with myself to get me to do it...partially because my wrists were hurting after writing and partially because I had no time. I started to keep the journal with me, but the thought of whipping it out in public and scratching away started to seem looney to me. And the act of pulling it out of my purse, grabbing a pen and writing a full sentence started to become impossible in and of itself due to bad timing (or perfectly bad time). I then told myself that I owed myself one page per day of journaling...that was a recipe for failure right there...and then when I would finally sit down, I figured I would have this built of flood gate to open and I'd get a few pages, just the facts...and I'd be done. I used to fill books in months... it took me over a year to fill the last one...
That's when I decided to turn to this blogging thing. I figured, that as a non-pro, I am not subscribing to anyone's deadlines, but my own. I didn't want to give myself deadlines, but I still had to make a game of it just to keep even MYSELF interested. Cause I guess I have a slight ADD problem I guess... maybe.. perhaps.. what was I saying???
I hate when people blog blog blog...and then they're gone...cause they were "living life"... not HATE> I guess that's a strong word... I have seen that a lot is what I mean... and I saw it so much I thought "That's not gonna be me"...wow...that's a dumb thing to say...
IT'S ME IT'S ME!! Living life! Not logging it in! I'd like to think I'm not terribly personal on here, so it's not like I'm going to minute by minute catalogue my time "off"... it's not really that interesting. Thing 1 got out of 2nd grade. 3rd grade here we come! I wanted to get her something for her bday that rocked...a big bag of books...hehehe...
Then, there's this whole (now) 17 month old thing going on... which is fine. She's her own person, not a like her sister... Which we were prepared for. But DAMN... talk about taking advantage... Daddy even got up with her a few times last week in the middle of the night cause she was just...bothered. she just needed someone...and he was there...and he cuddled...and snuggled...and half awake walked her back to bed and tucked her in all warm like... she was happy after that...
Her eye teeth are coming in at a snail's pace...especially when compared to the rest of her mouth... She LOVES to run away from you...so "training" her to walk with us will be a total adventure...
As completely different as life gets everyday, I fall more in love with where we are at everyday. Even though I still have some weird mouth/jaw/tooth/ear/throat pain going on every day in some way, shape or form (I'll be looking into that sometime soon)...
So that's ONE way of catching up. I have this little book... It's a cute little thing... it's in my desk at work...and It's full of "ideas" for the blog... it's so full, I almost need a new one.
Talk about a step in the WRONG direction... I inadvertently ended up doing something I was un able to do a year ago...jotting down ideas one day at a time... well there you have it...that's catch up sesh number one... hope I didn't make anyone fall asleep...
that would suck...but then again... I'm not the one with would be key marks on their face... so there's that...
I didn't know I was doing it, but I was... It's been almost a year since I stopped physically journaling. I thought for sure when that happened that a psych consult would surely follow.
What I am realizing is that my world did not in fact come crashing down around me.
So, I take that as a very positive sign! A sign of the strong foundation that myself and others have built to preserve...I am still standing without what I thought for sure was keeping me sane by allowing me to clearly and concisely catalogue my thoughts. I stopped because, well, you know when something you love becomes work? My journaling became work. I started having to make games with myself to get me to do it...partially because my wrists were hurting after writing and partially because I had no time. I started to keep the journal with me, but the thought of whipping it out in public and scratching away started to seem looney to me. And the act of pulling it out of my purse, grabbing a pen and writing a full sentence started to become impossible in and of itself due to bad timing (or perfectly bad time). I then told myself that I owed myself one page per day of journaling...that was a recipe for failure right there...and then when I would finally sit down, I figured I would have this built of flood gate to open and I'd get a few pages, just the facts...and I'd be done. I used to fill books in months... it took me over a year to fill the last one...
That's when I decided to turn to this blogging thing. I figured, that as a non-pro, I am not subscribing to anyone's deadlines, but my own. I didn't want to give myself deadlines, but I still had to make a game of it just to keep even MYSELF interested. Cause I guess I have a slight ADD problem I guess... maybe.. perhaps.. what was I saying???
I hate when people blog blog blog...and then they're gone...cause they were "living life"... not HATE> I guess that's a strong word... I have seen that a lot is what I mean... and I saw it so much I thought "That's not gonna be me"...wow...that's a dumb thing to say...
IT'S ME IT'S ME!! Living life! Not logging it in! I'd like to think I'm not terribly personal on here, so it's not like I'm going to minute by minute catalogue my time "off"... it's not really that interesting. Thing 1 got out of 2nd grade. 3rd grade here we come! I wanted to get her something for her bday that rocked...a big bag of books...hehehe...
Then, there's this whole (now) 17 month old thing going on... which is fine. She's her own person, not a like her sister... Which we were prepared for. But DAMN... talk about taking advantage... Daddy even got up with her a few times last week in the middle of the night cause she was just...bothered. she just needed someone...and he was there...and he cuddled...and snuggled...and half awake walked her back to bed and tucked her in all warm like... she was happy after that...
Her eye teeth are coming in at a snail's pace...especially when compared to the rest of her mouth... She LOVES to run away from you...so "training" her to walk with us will be a total adventure...
As completely different as life gets everyday, I fall more in love with where we are at everyday. Even though I still have some weird mouth/jaw/tooth/ear/throat pain going on every day in some way, shape or form (I'll be looking into that sometime soon)...
So that's ONE way of catching up. I have this little book... It's a cute little thing... it's in my desk at work...and It's full of "ideas" for the blog... it's so full, I almost need a new one.
Talk about a step in the WRONG direction... I inadvertently ended up doing something I was un able to do a year ago...jotting down ideas one day at a time... well there you have it...that's catch up sesh number one... hope I didn't make anyone fall asleep...
that would suck...but then again... I'm not the one with would be key marks on their face... so there's that...
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
One Month in One Day....
... because that's what I feel like...
I have no excuses for myself to not have posted ANYTHING in just over a month... We have been knee deep in life and since I am not a person who gets paid for this, I have had no good reason TO post anything either.
Thing 1's softball season is in FULL swing and we have her coach from her first season back which is good. The whole family is on board with her coaches which makes it easier to sit there and watch Thing 1...and the REST of the team because there are no favorites... getting talked at and talked to and told to run laps, to the fence and back, do calisthenics and what have you and do this extra because you messed up and blahblahblahblah...
Thing 2...TEETH... oy-to-the-vay... The first set of molars all came in at ONCE... now it's EYE TEETH!! One at a time, and they're killing us ALL... a week on and a week off and now 3 days on, 4 days off, 7 days on and vacation... that's daddy's schedule... that's awesome.... the team had a winning streak on the road and it made it such a great vibe when he went back to work last night... Practice runs LATE, games run LATE... it's ALL LATE... fine.. we signed up for it and it doesn't even last that long... one more month and that's it...that's IT!! Amazing... I just got the softball team picture... Harley said she thinks her picture gets better and better every year...
Well who am I to argue?? Of course she's right...cause she's the most beautifullest thing in the world :)
Work has kept me running ragged, on my toes and constant state of OHMYGODOHMYGOD!! Another reason for the silence... of course it always seems that when I found a moment to myself to jot anything down, I got sidetracked... such is life.
C'est la vie...
Fine fine fine... Things are good though... pretty darn sweet if you ask me.
Choni has a possible partner in crime to work with on possible short film projects which is fantastic for him. Might even get into his videography business... still waiting and seeing on that. Fine fine fine.
We had a super busy fun family filled weekend that I can't believe just happened... I'm tired from it...really...but it was super awesome :) I used a gift card from Christmas which is always a great accomplishment.. I got home from work one day last week and Choni had the whole garage cleaned out... and now everything minus the yuck is back in it and it's so clean you can walk around in there now!
I almost got internet at home, but Verizon kept that from happening.. bastards...
Probably a good thing because it's the one thing keeping me as the only person I know without a tablet. Oddly enough something my almost-8-year-old likes to point out on an almost daily basis... Hard to raise children in this technobabble world...
Really...
So many things coming up and happening I can't wait. CAN'T.WAIT!
My bestie, her woman, and my merry band of miscreants are planning an amazing trip to NY.. No city for us, I have gone enough for two lifetimes and my honey has seen and edited enough footage to last him... so we're good on that... I want to lounge on Lake George... if I can do that holding my main squeeze's hand with my kids splashing in crisp clean lake water... I'll be a happy camper!!
I have been forced to abandon the Nail Polish challenge for a short period of time. As a result of my stressball-loseriness, I have chewed my nails to nubs and am in the process of de-uglifying them. Until that has passed, no news on that front.
There is a two day trek to the Emerald City on which we stop halfway and see some kin folk, a possible stay from Kid Sister, a possible stay from my niece... but we'll see... still ALOT of summer to go. Thing 1 just got out of school and she is already ready to go back...
And since our dog was put down, she has been asking for a low maintenance pet of somekind...so there is THAT to look forward to. I am a little curious myself to see how that will play out...
Our little one has proven to be such an amazing addition to our family, she makes us laugh and smile everyday..sometimes, just sometimes, we want to pull our hair out. But that's MOSTLY to do with the damned teeth...DAMMIT!!
Not a day, NOT ONE DAY, goes by where, if we are in public, someone comments on the cuteness of the wee one...and then immediately on the big sister...
I got some answers on my foot pain and now that I know what it is and it has a name, the healing can begin... any time now... ANY TIME... It's not going to fix itself over night, there are things I need to do to ease the pain and help correct it, but I have had more good days than bad days in three months, so I can't really complain...
I need to take Thing 1 to do the dentist this summer, and after I have been there and dropped way too much money on MY mouth, I am totally not going to forget to do that with her!! damn teeth....
Allergies are rampant this year already... no sooner I read an article about how bad it's going to be I start to feel the beginnings of discomfort...I have already bought a new fresh bottle of Benadryl for Thing 1 and I to share.
I am getting a cut AND a color before I got on vacation which I couldn't be MORE excited about if I tried because I never get to do both at once between MY schedule and the hair chicks' schedule... My new rule of thumb, if I can put my hair in a rubberband, it's too long!
The way things have gone lately, I'm just glad we have cars that run and a house... and food. food is always good. unless it's tofu... I fucking hate tofu...
I have no excuses for myself to not have posted ANYTHING in just over a month... We have been knee deep in life and since I am not a person who gets paid for this, I have had no good reason TO post anything either.
Thing 1's softball season is in FULL swing and we have her coach from her first season back which is good. The whole family is on board with her coaches which makes it easier to sit there and watch Thing 1...and the REST of the team because there are no favorites... getting talked at and talked to and told to run laps, to the fence and back, do calisthenics and what have you and do this extra because you messed up and blahblahblahblah...
Thing 2...TEETH... oy-to-the-vay... The first set of molars all came in at ONCE... now it's EYE TEETH!! One at a time, and they're killing us ALL... a week on and a week off and now 3 days on, 4 days off, 7 days on and vacation... that's daddy's schedule... that's awesome.... the team had a winning streak on the road and it made it such a great vibe when he went back to work last night... Practice runs LATE, games run LATE... it's ALL LATE... fine.. we signed up for it and it doesn't even last that long... one more month and that's it...that's IT!! Amazing... I just got the softball team picture... Harley said she thinks her picture gets better and better every year...
Well who am I to argue?? Of course she's right...cause she's the most beautifullest thing in the world :)
Work has kept me running ragged, on my toes and constant state of OHMYGODOHMYGOD!! Another reason for the silence... of course it always seems that when I found a moment to myself to jot anything down, I got sidetracked... such is life.
C'est la vie...
Fine fine fine... Things are good though... pretty darn sweet if you ask me.
Choni has a possible partner in crime to work with on possible short film projects which is fantastic for him. Might even get into his videography business... still waiting and seeing on that. Fine fine fine.
We had a super busy fun family filled weekend that I can't believe just happened... I'm tired from it...really...but it was super awesome :) I used a gift card from Christmas which is always a great accomplishment.. I got home from work one day last week and Choni had the whole garage cleaned out... and now everything minus the yuck is back in it and it's so clean you can walk around in there now!
I almost got internet at home, but Verizon kept that from happening.. bastards...
Probably a good thing because it's the one thing keeping me as the only person I know without a tablet. Oddly enough something my almost-8-year-old likes to point out on an almost daily basis... Hard to raise children in this technobabble world...
Really...
So many things coming up and happening I can't wait. CAN'T.WAIT!
My bestie, her woman, and my merry band of miscreants are planning an amazing trip to NY.. No city for us, I have gone enough for two lifetimes and my honey has seen and edited enough footage to last him... so we're good on that... I want to lounge on Lake George... if I can do that holding my main squeeze's hand with my kids splashing in crisp clean lake water... I'll be a happy camper!!
I have been forced to abandon the Nail Polish challenge for a short period of time. As a result of my stressball-loseriness, I have chewed my nails to nubs and am in the process of de-uglifying them. Until that has passed, no news on that front.
There is a two day trek to the Emerald City on which we stop halfway and see some kin folk, a possible stay from Kid Sister, a possible stay from my niece... but we'll see... still ALOT of summer to go. Thing 1 just got out of school and she is already ready to go back...
And since our dog was put down, she has been asking for a low maintenance pet of somekind...so there is THAT to look forward to. I am a little curious myself to see how that will play out...
Our little one has proven to be such an amazing addition to our family, she makes us laugh and smile everyday..sometimes, just sometimes, we want to pull our hair out. But that's MOSTLY to do with the damned teeth...DAMMIT!!
Not a day, NOT ONE DAY, goes by where, if we are in public, someone comments on the cuteness of the wee one...and then immediately on the big sister...
I got some answers on my foot pain and now that I know what it is and it has a name, the healing can begin... any time now... ANY TIME... It's not going to fix itself over night, there are things I need to do to ease the pain and help correct it, but I have had more good days than bad days in three months, so I can't really complain...
I need to take Thing 1 to do the dentist this summer, and after I have been there and dropped way too much money on MY mouth, I am totally not going to forget to do that with her!! damn teeth....
Allergies are rampant this year already... no sooner I read an article about how bad it's going to be I start to feel the beginnings of discomfort...I have already bought a new fresh bottle of Benadryl for Thing 1 and I to share.
I am getting a cut AND a color before I got on vacation which I couldn't be MORE excited about if I tried because I never get to do both at once between MY schedule and the hair chicks' schedule... My new rule of thumb, if I can put my hair in a rubberband, it's too long!
The way things have gone lately, I'm just glad we have cars that run and a house... and food. food is always good. unless it's tofu... I fucking hate tofu...
Friday, May 3, 2013
Two Ships In The Night...
That's us right now...
The job is going so well... even when the equipment doesn't work right, he still likes it cause he's got a good group of guys to work with this year. His "work girlfriend" isn't around as much, she's only doing her gig part time-ish and his buddy the bat boy is leaving this month... so it's new people all around!! Which is actually good. And I'm so glad it's good. Last year had me worried... that he wouldn't want to go back... I don't care about the money. Not really... It's nice... don't get me wrong. But we don't NEED it. I like to think that takes the pressure off his job. It truly makes it Sport.
My coworker has been in and out of work and where our department was 5 people when I came into it, then 4...now 3...and temporarily we are at two...barely at two... we are nose and mouth out of water with two...
I know I've said it before, but I'm not the kind of person that NEEDS all this EXTRA time to myself. First of all, I don't have ANY friends near me. They are all out of state or county at least... My little buddies are Thing 1 and Thing 2... Sometimes Kid Sister comes with me too... but mostly it's the Things... And Choni... He's my bestie fo shizzle and I miss him so much when he's gone.
I have plenty of things to keep me busy, but it's always prevalent why I am doing those things is because I have spare time because he's not there...so it's a reminder upon a reminder that I am alone... And it's only May... It's good because it makes me appreciate him even MORE than I already do...and I do... I do so much that I'm thinking of skipping Mother's Day completely this year and doing two Father's Days.
Between work at work and work at home I have been so busy I haven't done much of the "me" things that I need to do... I even forgot to brush my teeth this morning. That is unacceptable since I have a checkup at the dentist on Tuesday and I brush three times a day...especially when I'm at work. I usually get in two teeth brushings on the weekends... depending on how the day unfolds...maybe one if I'm lucky... but I'm into my routine.
Routine is helpful. I am quite certain I would have to be medicated if I didn't do things in a certain order. Take the laundry for instance. I had to do kid laundry...but I can't do the kid laundry until the beds are made so I can have a place to put the laundry and fold it and move it from bed to closet or bed to drawer. So, first the beds had to be made. And I can't walk from bed to closet or bed to drawer if the floor's covered in toys. So basically I created a monster when I made the kids clean their room (Thing 2 basically took blocks in and out of the block bag to help) just so I could do a couple of loads of laundry. Then, that took all night and then it was bath time and then it was bed time and no laundry was done. I'm not saying it makes sense. I'm saying that I couldn't even consider laundry if those things weren't done in that order. Now, tonight, I will go home...and start the process again. Except this time, there's no softball practice to make the night shorter. I know there will be laundry!
This is early season gibberish... All of this goes away when I find my swing of things... But usually the swing of things doesn't happen until softball is over! Opening Day is tomorrow and then, before we know it... it's over! I can't believe how fast it goes! Which is why I try and do my part and take as much pictures and video as my SD card holds!
I do have things to keep my brain busy, there are always craft projects. Which reminds me, I have a mother's day project to finish...and that shits coming up fast!! I like to keep atleast a few projects rolling at once because I might not be in a mood to crochet when I get home. I might want to make something out of homemade playdough... or I might want to embroider something... or one of my cross stitching projects...or work on Marysu's baby book... I don't always end up with the time to do these things, but when I have a moment to myself and feel the need, I have a plethora to keep my occupied... I still miss my Choni though...
But life's a trade off isn't it? Our cars are in great shape (one window doesn't roll down in the civic but hey it's 10 years old what did I expect?) We got a new fridge c/o SCE's low income energy assist program... we have fabulous neighbors. School's almost out! I might get to see more of Kid Sister this summer... The kids are incredibly great right now... Harley is doing well with school, she is doing all kinds of big girl, big sister, almost 8 year old things. And the thinks that she thinks are amazing. I love her amazing brain... Marysu... a guaranteed good time for everyone as long as she is fed. Great sleeper, two two hour naps a day is amazing! She's such a hammsammich and always laughs and smiles... Unless she's hungry... That kid...she's gonna eat us out of house and home! I'm just glad I have an eater on our hands! Harley is doing pretty well with her eating habits. Which reminds me, I need to go to the store tonight! haha! Pancake and Sausage breakfast for pre-Opening Day Festivities will be feeding us tomorrow, so that's a good thing! I don't have to worry about that atleast! Well, I'm going to wrap it up. My rice noodle soup has devoured all the water in the bowl and is ready for consumption. I also have an ice cold Dr. Pepper with my name on it!
No, literally, I had to write my name on it because these bastards will totally take it from me....
The job is going so well... even when the equipment doesn't work right, he still likes it cause he's got a good group of guys to work with this year. His "work girlfriend" isn't around as much, she's only doing her gig part time-ish and his buddy the bat boy is leaving this month... so it's new people all around!! Which is actually good. And I'm so glad it's good. Last year had me worried... that he wouldn't want to go back... I don't care about the money. Not really... It's nice... don't get me wrong. But we don't NEED it. I like to think that takes the pressure off his job. It truly makes it Sport.
My coworker has been in and out of work and where our department was 5 people when I came into it, then 4...now 3...and temporarily we are at two...barely at two... we are nose and mouth out of water with two...
I know I've said it before, but I'm not the kind of person that NEEDS all this EXTRA time to myself. First of all, I don't have ANY friends near me. They are all out of state or county at least... My little buddies are Thing 1 and Thing 2... Sometimes Kid Sister comes with me too... but mostly it's the Things... And Choni... He's my bestie fo shizzle and I miss him so much when he's gone.
I have plenty of things to keep me busy, but it's always prevalent why I am doing those things is because I have spare time because he's not there...so it's a reminder upon a reminder that I am alone... And it's only May... It's good because it makes me appreciate him even MORE than I already do...and I do... I do so much that I'm thinking of skipping Mother's Day completely this year and doing two Father's Days.
Between work at work and work at home I have been so busy I haven't done much of the "me" things that I need to do... I even forgot to brush my teeth this morning. That is unacceptable since I have a checkup at the dentist on Tuesday and I brush three times a day...especially when I'm at work. I usually get in two teeth brushings on the weekends... depending on how the day unfolds...maybe one if I'm lucky... but I'm into my routine.
Routine is helpful. I am quite certain I would have to be medicated if I didn't do things in a certain order. Take the laundry for instance. I had to do kid laundry...but I can't do the kid laundry until the beds are made so I can have a place to put the laundry and fold it and move it from bed to closet or bed to drawer. So, first the beds had to be made. And I can't walk from bed to closet or bed to drawer if the floor's covered in toys. So basically I created a monster when I made the kids clean their room (Thing 2 basically took blocks in and out of the block bag to help) just so I could do a couple of loads of laundry. Then, that took all night and then it was bath time and then it was bed time and no laundry was done. I'm not saying it makes sense. I'm saying that I couldn't even consider laundry if those things weren't done in that order. Now, tonight, I will go home...and start the process again. Except this time, there's no softball practice to make the night shorter. I know there will be laundry!
This is early season gibberish... All of this goes away when I find my swing of things... But usually the swing of things doesn't happen until softball is over! Opening Day is tomorrow and then, before we know it... it's over! I can't believe how fast it goes! Which is why I try and do my part and take as much pictures and video as my SD card holds!
I do have things to keep my brain busy, there are always craft projects. Which reminds me, I have a mother's day project to finish...and that shits coming up fast!! I like to keep atleast a few projects rolling at once because I might not be in a mood to crochet when I get home. I might want to make something out of homemade playdough... or I might want to embroider something... or one of my cross stitching projects...or work on Marysu's baby book... I don't always end up with the time to do these things, but when I have a moment to myself and feel the need, I have a plethora to keep my occupied... I still miss my Choni though...
But life's a trade off isn't it? Our cars are in great shape (one window doesn't roll down in the civic but hey it's 10 years old what did I expect?) We got a new fridge c/o SCE's low income energy assist program... we have fabulous neighbors. School's almost out! I might get to see more of Kid Sister this summer... The kids are incredibly great right now... Harley is doing well with school, she is doing all kinds of big girl, big sister, almost 8 year old things. And the thinks that she thinks are amazing. I love her amazing brain... Marysu... a guaranteed good time for everyone as long as she is fed. Great sleeper, two two hour naps a day is amazing! She's such a hammsammich and always laughs and smiles... Unless she's hungry... That kid...she's gonna eat us out of house and home! I'm just glad I have an eater on our hands! Harley is doing pretty well with her eating habits. Which reminds me, I need to go to the store tonight! haha! Pancake and Sausage breakfast for pre-Opening Day Festivities will be feeding us tomorrow, so that's a good thing! I don't have to worry about that atleast! Well, I'm going to wrap it up. My rice noodle soup has devoured all the water in the bowl and is ready for consumption. I also have an ice cold Dr. Pepper with my name on it!
No, literally, I had to write my name on it because these bastards will totally take it from me....
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